How To Deal With Disappointment

I have been getting a lot of great ideas from fellow blogger Souparni about post ideas and I thought I should do this one because everyone at some point in life has been disappointed whether it was something small or something life altering. I was going to do this post particularly for students who didn’t achieve the grades they hoped to but to be honest this advice works for other disappointments too so I just wrote about it in general. Disappointments are a part of life and no one can get everything they want all the time. These are a few things I personally find helpful in dealing with disappointment:

Grieve- It’s normal to feel sad or even depressed after something disappointing has happened in your life. You just have to let the sadness run its course instead of trying to repress it. And you also need to remember that this feeling won’t last forever.

Acceptance- An important part of the process is accepting that something that you didn’t expect has happened and that unfortunately it is something disappointing. You need to accept that not everything works out perfectly and this was one of those incidences. Accepting this will allow you to move on faster.

Know yourself- You need to always remember that making mistakes or not achieving something you hope to is part of being human. The beauty of being human is that you are not perfect and that humans are constantly making mistakes every single day. Know that you can achieve anything you set your mind to and just because it didn’t happen this time doesn’t mean you should give up. It just means you have to work even harder than you did the last time. Know that you are capable of more than this.

Positivity- Sometimes it’s very hard to be positive when something disappointing has occurred in your life but you need to remember that this isn’t the end of the world. Something better is still out there waiting for you. So instead of mopping around and whining about how unfair life is do something positive because no matter how down you are it will definitely help. Go out and help the poor and remind yourself how lucky you are to have so much. Adopt an animal from a shelter and give it a new home. Listen to some positive music instead of depressing music. Read some self help books. Just basically do something to keep yourself busy and positive even if you don’t feel like it (which to be honest you probably won’t)

Smile- There is scientific evidence suggesting that the mere act of smiling can actually help a lot in changing your mood. Smiling causes an increase of the release of dopamine (the neurotransmitter in your brain that makes you happy) which makes you feel happier. So try doing something that will make you smile or better yet laugh like watching a funny movie or hanging out with friends.

Explore Your Choices- If the disappointing event has left you in a situation where you now have to rethink your future remember that even though you were looking forward to a certain future things do change. Look at this as a way of being able to readjust your plans. Maybe it just wasn’t meant to be. So instead of giving up look for new methods of achieving what you want or make new goals that you can achieve. Just remember not to give up.

Do Better- If you get a chance to redo something you should take it. For example, for people who didn’t do so well in their exams you can resit some of your papers and work harder and do better. And for other things too, if you’re able to get a second chance to do better than before, go for it.

Reassess Your Life/Goals- If there is absolutely nothing you can do than reassess your goals and try out something different. Maybe this just wasn’t meant to be for you and maybe change is a good thing. Try out new things and make some new goals.

Sometimes disappointment can get overwhelming and therapy can help get your life back on track or at least teach you how to deal properly in a healthy was with the disappointment. You feeling disappointed or down can also effect the people around you and sometimes couples therapy can help you deal with it together as a couple.

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31 thoughts on “How To Deal With Disappointment

  1. Thank you soo much for this Pooja! I completely agree with everything you said. Especially when we hit rock bottom either we can surrender to the situation and live in dismay or we can simply push ourselves. Your words give all of us hope in this really hard and crucial time!! 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    1. You’re very welcome! Yes exactly you just have to fight through it and not let it pull you down. You should always keep trying again and again until you achieve what you want 🙂


  2. Great post, Pooja. I feel I have to add something about the retaking exams. It’s one thing to tell someone to work harder, but if they don’t know what they are doing wrong, they can’t. When I was 12 years old I failed an exam badly. I had to do research on some Medieval history thing, and there was nothing I can find (this was in the 70s so I was limited to the school library). I understand how I had such a bad grade, but to this day I do not know how I could have done better with the few materials available. What rankles is not the E- grade, but a teacher who would not show me how I could have done better. It was not until I started teaching 40 years later that this was a useful grade. It made me a better teacher because I don’t want to leave a student not having some** understanding of what isn’t working and how to improve.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much for sharing that story. A lot of times we are blindly given assignments without actually being given the knowledge and even though it’s a lot easier now with the internet it’s still a big problem that teachers don’t teach to give their students a better understanding but rather to make them pass exams.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Great post.
    I mainly deal with disappointment by writing. It helps me relieve stress, say all the necessary things to get the disappointment off my chest to mediate and focus.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yeah writing is such a great way to relieve stress and I know exactly what you mean because when I write I forget about everything else and I just feel so peaceful during that time 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

  4. “How to deal with disappointment” was a good post. I know for a fact when I am disappointed, I listen to sad music, totally opposite of what others may think works and I am not saying it makes things better, because it doesn’t but for some reason it speaks to me differently when I am in a mood. I always heard music can kill sorrows faster than drinking. Now a days people are quick to turn to drug or alcohol abuse in hopes they can forget the pain and hurt, but all it does it make it worse over the course of time.

    When I am disappointed about a situation, I tend to turn to music and alone time, I do take time to allow myself to cry and I typically stray from others, sometimes I sit in a dark room with nothing but music playing, just to think.. to let go, to escape my thoughts, etc.


    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yeah music really does help so many people and it can be really therapeutic for so many. These days drugs and alcohol are so readily available to people and they don’t realize that taking these things will just make the situation worse. Rather than getting addicted to something it’s better to just accept the situation and find a way to deal with it.

      Liked by 1 person

        1. Music definitely plays a large role in it and I think writing or drawing helps me a lot too. And cooking helps improve my mood a lot when I’m feeling kind of down


  5. My life, my past life was full of it. I came to realize all those has to come first in order for my life to improve. Yes we all have dissapontments but if we are to have good and best moments lets acknowledge it and do appreciate it, no matter what. At least we can get back up and let life be life and keep it going.

    Liked by 1 person

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