5 Lessons & 5 New Goals At 25

My laptop was trying to type 52 instead of 25 but I assure you I am only turning 25 today. It’s been a crazy journey to 25 and so much has happened in the last few years with moving multiple times first to Canada and then back to Kenya. Getting my degree in History and finally graduating. Meeting so many amazing people both online and in person. Starting to work online full-time as a freelancer. The list goes on and on.

I generally don’t like birthdays very much. For some reason, they always end up being disappointing or sad for some reason. I feel like my birthday is on a bit of an odd day as it is and it just seems to have some sort of a bittersweet energy around it. Hoping this one will be different though, but let’s see.

A small part of me didn’t think I would make it to 25 and I’m happy for myself that I did. I also didn’t think I would have this much grey hair or forehead wrinkles but I have only the wonderful genes my parents gave me to thank for those.

I feel like twenty-five is one of those years that signal the end of my young adulthood and I think I’m finally fully an adult now. It’s weird. I have random shoulder pains now.

Anyway, enough rambling. I’m very hangry right now waiting for my food to arrive so that may be the cause of the rambling. Just started writing again after eating and feeling much more stable (but not fully). Before I get hungry again, here are five lessons I have learnt in my 25 years of existence although I would disregard the first 10 years or so because I was just a kid and barely conscious.

5 Lessons I’ve Learnt At 25

  1. People kind of suck- I know- I’m starting this out super positive. Just kidding. But not about people sucking. I’ve learnt over the years that a lot of people sucks. Especially with the pandemic. I think it brought out the worst in some people and made me conscious of a lot of horrible things. HOWEVER, it did also bring out the best in some people. I have also learnt in these 25 years that some people are absolutely wonderful, kind and amazing. Don’t cut yourself off because you’ve had a few bad experiences. Be cautious but also be open.
  2. A positive mindset goes a long way- when we constantly expect the worst that’s what the Universe will deliver to us. If we expect something good (although be prepared for the worst too) we are more likely to succeed and we will also remain on our path since we have a positive attitude towards the future and are much less likely to give up.
  3. Imperfection is fine- I can be a bit of a perfectionist and like to be the best at what I do. This has helped me in many ways but it’s also made my life much more difficult in some ways. It made me want to never try new things since I was afraid of failure and that made me miserable. Now, I know that perfection is impossible to achieve and chasing after it only brings misery. That’s why, now I try with the mindset of “if it works out that’s great and if it doesn’t that’s okay too.” It’s not always easy to keep this mindset since I am who I am and it’s hard to change but I’m working at it and hoping for the best.
  4. Negative feelings are fine- I am a repressor to my core. If I could I would repress everything. However, that’s obviously not a healthy way to deal with anything ever. As humans we experience a spectrum of feelings and each of these feelings no matter how difficult to bare has a place and purpose in our life. They exist for a reason and we feel for a reason (unless you are a sociopath in which case please disregard this point entirely). Toxic positivity has sort of pushed this agenda of we have to be happy all the time but it doesn’t work like that. No one is happy all the time and if you truly believe you are happy all the time you may want to seek help. Over time, I have learnt to accept the bad with the good. It’s difficult but it’s best longterm. Not always, I still repress sometimes but I’m getting better.
  5. Know your boundaries- I’m a bit of a people pleaser and that has taught me how important boundaries are. If you let them, people will walk all over you. It’s okay to be kind and help others but it’s also okay to have boundaries and say “no” when you have to.

5 New Goals

  1. Learn to play the guitar- it’s something I have wanted to do for years but was never able to. I really wanted to play as a teenager but couldn’t afford to buy myself a guitar. However, I have been saving for a few months now so that I can finally get one and learn to play. I don’t know if I’ll be great at it but I want to give it a try at least.
  2. Letting things go- I’m a bad tempered person and I have a hard time letting things go. I always get people in my comments saying I don’t seem bad tempered but trust me I am. I’m quick to anger and I hold on to it. You do not want to be anywhere near me when I’m mad. However, I don’t want to be like that anymore. I am trying to be more evenly tempered and sensitive to what others are going through.
  3. Read more- after starting university, I feel like I have been reading so much less than I used. I went through multiple books a week when I was younger. Although I know that’s not possible anymore since I have adult responsibilities now, I still want to read when I can. I want to read at least 12 books in the next twelve months.
  4. Travel- one thing that has become abundantly clear over the last few years is that at the end all we have left is our memories and I plan to make as many of them this year as possible. I want to travel as much as I can both nationally and abroad. I think it’s better now with restrictions decreasing in most places. Of course, I’ll still try to be safe as much as possible but I don’t want to put my life on hold anymore.
  5. Learn new things- just because I am done with university doesn’t mean I have to stop learning. I want to continue to read more about history as well as other things I am interested in and learn more about the world. I also want to pick up new hobbies and learn new skills because in my opinion you’re never too old to learn new things. I am currently reading a fascinating book that’s already teaching me so much so yay!

Conclusion

Well, if you’re reading this I’m probably officially twenty-five years old. This is my last chance to score a date with Leonardo DiCaprio (in case you don’t get that joke, it’s funny because he never dates anyone older than 25). I have a lot to look forward to at 25 and some things that I am not really looking forward to. It’s a bittersweet birthday but I hope to make the most of it. Hope to share more about my birthday and how I celebrated it soon!

Let me know what your twenties were/are like in the comments below.


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82 thoughts on “5 Lessons & 5 New Goals At 25

  1. Happy birthday 🎂! Some people just find an age they like and stay with it 😉 Lot less to worry about with candles etc. 😊

  2. Happy Birthday, Pooja! At 25, you are almost a baby in my view. Get used to the shoulder pain, I live with it every day and the gray hair too. You are right, it’s all in those darn genes!

  3. Happy birthday! So young and so wise! Lol, Leonardo DiCaprio will miss out if he passes you by!

    “ A positive mindset goes a long way- when we constantly expect the worst that’s what the Universe will deliver to us.”

    It’s funny how this thought gets repeated, bit I have come to think that when we’re in a negative mindset we filter out all the positive outcomes because we struggle to believe it could happen for us, and when we’re in a positive mindset we see those same opportunities and act on them!

    Our mindset is our filter, allowing us to see some things or it blocks those same things out!

    Blessings!

      1. Mindset is EVERYTHING! I used to laugh at that idea thinking it was all new age garbage, but it really is true! I’m amazed at the simplicity of it! The holy books speak of it but the simple truth of it has been lost in religiosity. Thankfully it’s being rediscovered and people are putting it into practice in their lives!

  4. Omg Pooja!!!
    HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY FRIEND!!!
    Hope it’s been a great day!!
    💖💖💖🥂
    look at you making us all laugh on your birthday.
    all of this is hysterical…
    Good luck with this:
    💖💖😂
    “This is my last chance to score a date with Leonardo DiCaprio (in case you don’t get that joke, it’s funny because he never dates anyone older than 25). “

  5. Happy birthday!!!! There are 3 tricks:
    – Lots of water
    – Lots of exercise
    – Lying about your age
    God bless you 🥳. I wish you the best birthday and your best year yet.

  6. Happy Birthday, Pooja…!!! You best achievement in the last 25 years is your maturity… Your writings show what an achiever you are.. All of the best for more…!!!

  7. 1. I’m turning 21, in the october. Also, graduating with history, in 1 or 2 months, from the Banaras Hindu University.

    2. Nowadays, I started watching a lot of stand-up comedy shows, selected ted talks and inspirational music.

    3. I can relate to your words (For example, getting angry), and wish, we both improve our specific problems, to live better.

    4. Writing posts do matter, because, in my case, I get inspire by my previous work. You can’t work with unseen thoughts in the mind.

    5. I do learn from your viewpoint and experiences. It’s a good post.

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU POOJA 🥳🎉🎉

  8. Happy birthday. I think your writing has made you more reflective than your contemporaries. I liked that you mentioning about learning new things and reading. I am still learning at 63 and I think lifelong learning is about lifelong discovery. Since 2006 I joined the international organization Toastmasters and am still enjoying that and they are in 142 countries. I also have studied german, turkish and now spanish. Best wishes in the year ahead and I enjoy your posts and instagram. You have a wonderful sense of humor.

    1. Thank you so much! Yes, it’s never too late to learn something new. In my opinion, it’s best to keep learning new things- it keeps you busy in the best way.

  9. Btw, I do agree with you with Lesson 1 that people suck, but they also are amazing! I have been feeding and obseriving magpies since I moved to Calgary and in some ways, I can honestly say humans are stupid compared to magpies. When life gets tough, I want to be a magpie!

    1. Haha sometimes birds can be better than humans lol! I want to be a golf fish when it gets tough so I can just swim and not care lol 😆

  10. What songs are you going to learn on your guitar?
    I recommend Taylor Swift, as her songs are beautiful and the guitar’s not too complicated.
    Have fun!
    J

  11. Totally agree with your list of things you have learned and things you want to do. My own experience tells me that I grew up in a very dysfunctional family which gave me so different a perspective from my friends. I am sorry to say that most of my friends are very conservative. Now so many years later, I finally come to grasp why I always differ in opinion so much from my friends–they didn’t have the experience I had. Often I feel that their opinions are acceptable opinions, but in order to truly have a real life of my own independent resolve, I just can’t be like them.

    1. I definitely understand that feeling. Our experiences play such a huge role in who we become and often those that haven’t experienced hardships are more conservative from what I’ve seen.

  12. Happiest blessed one my darling. You are a full adult now. 25 is indeed a special age and it’s a season of time where one is at least expected to have kind of made the best out of life. However, there’s no time frame. Age is nothing but a number.
    Super proud of you

    I fully relate to all the points. And good luck with your goals. I know you will smash them one by one without a doubt. Love you.

    1. Thank you so much 😊😊

      Yes that’s how I feel like about 25. It’s an interesting age with so much potential.

      Thanks and lots of love 💕❤

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