Living With Dissociative Identity Disorder

By Carol Anne

 

I’m not alone, but I’m not whole

A fractured self, a fragmented soul

I’m a tapestry, torn and worn

A multitude of voices, forever sworn

 

To rise and fall, to live and die

In a never-ending struggle to survive

The memories, the emotions, the pain

A constant battle to maintain

 

I’m a chameleon, ever-changing form

A kaleidoscope of characters, each one a storm

Some gentle, some fierce, some lost and worn

Each one a piece of me, forever reborn

 

I’m a stranger to myself, lost in the haze

A maze of mirrors, reflections in daze

I’m searching for a glimpse of the truth

But it’s hidden behind a mask of youth

 

The voices whisper secrets in my ear

Whispers of what’s real, and what’s clear

But which one is truth? Which one is lie?

As I navigate this internal sky

 

I’m a puzzle, broken and incomplete

A jigsaw of shards, impossible to repeat

The pieces don’t fit, the edges don’t meet

But still I try to make sense of the defeat

 

I’m a work in progress, an unfinished art

A masterpiece of chaos, a fractured heart

But in the midst of this turmoil and strife

I’ll find my way, through this internal life

 

For I am strong, I am resilient too

I’ll rise above the din and chaos anew

I’ll find my voice, my identity true

And I’ll learn to live with this condition anew.


About “Living With Dissociative Identity Disorder”:

This post was written by Carol from Therapy Bits. I’m sure many of you in the blogging world are familiar with her blog. This is a poem about her experiences with living with dissociative identity disorder. Do take a minute to check out her blog by clicking here.

For more poetry click here.

For more guest posts click here.

I recently published my first book, All the Words I Kept Inside. If you’re interested and would like to read it, you can purchase it here.

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44 responses to “Living With Dissociative Identity Disorder”

  1. Powerful poetry my mother-in-law from my first marriage had DID. It was quite the challenge.

    1. So sorry to hear your first MIL suffered from DID too. I can imagine that it’s quite difficult to handle.

      1. She had at least 12 alters, one actually cut hair and I would get haircuts

        1. Oh wow, that’s quite a lot. Most people don’t have more than a handful, from what I’ve learnt in psych classes. The free haircuts are probably nice though.

          1. They were

  2. thanks for sharing my poem Pooja! It is an honor to guest post on your blog! <3

    1. Happy to share it!

  3. This is an incredible and insightful poem.

    1. It is, Carol did a great job with it.

  4. Great poem!! Thanks for sharing! This is one of Child #3’s diagnoses, so it really hits home for me.

    1. Happy to share it and spread awareness! So sorry to hear that, it can’t be an easy condition to handle.

  5. Loved this poem of Carol anne’s, Pooja!💓

    1. So glad to hear that!

  6. That is an amazing poem. I do not know much about dissociative identity disorder, and I don’t know anyone who has it. However, I read a book by a philosopher, Bernardo Kastrup, called “The Idea of the World: A Multi-Disciplinary Argument for the Mental Nature of Reality” who claims that there is just one consciousness, the universe itself, and that we are all split identities within that consciousness in a fashion similar to dissociative identity disorder. I wasn’t entirely happy with the book but at least it is an interesting idea.

    1. That’s quite interesting, I don’t know if I would agree with that argument either but it does sound like a good read.

  7. A beautiful, insightful and touching poem. 💕

  8. Interesting poem

  9. This poem is so… incredible! ❤️

  10. Very insightful poem, Pooja! ❤️

  11. Such a moving poem Carol. Heartfelt and poignant

  12. Thanks everyone for all of your kind comments, I so appreciate you all!

  13. uniform of youth
    so uncouth
    the mask
    is either billy joel
    or rupert holmes

  14. Beautiful and poignant poem by Carol anne. Thank you for sharing, Pooja.

    1. Happy to share it!

  15. Wow, Carol, this is powerful stuff. You captured the struggle so well, but there’s this amazing strength shining through too. Sending all the best as you keep moving forward.

    – Ritish

  16. Thank you Pooja for mentioning Carols blog . This poem is very informative 💜💜

    1. Happy to do so, she’s an amazing person.

  17. I’ve never heard of this disorder. I’ve watched some people who can be enthusiastic about something and then become indifferent later for some mysterious reasons. I guess this is different from being ambivalent about something.

    1. Yes, it’s scary when people change like that but sometimes it can be DID or other times it can be different disorders like bipolar, narcissist personality or even anxiety.

  18. Goodness, Pooja, I appreciate your sharing this poem. These are timely thoughts to share, and I admire your advocacy in presenting them. I think the repetition of the word “worn” must be so appropriate to the poet and her life with the disorder. On the other note, I continue to be delighted with the achievement of your book.

    1. Thank you, I’m happy to share it knowing that it will help spread awareness for people suffering from DID.

  19. That must be so difficult to live with.

    1. I can’t even imagine. She’s so strong though.

  20. I like the tapestry of voices and the transforming images in the stanzas; surviving the pain maintains the rhymes well. Fierce Chameleons in a storm shedding skin like drops in a rainbow fading into a haze.
    The layers of the tapestry warp reality strings like a violent guitar and the woof barks like the wolf in the fairy-tale. A dream of many characters like a stage play. Who will be deemed to have the starring roles. Who will get the applause. There are child actors, there are villains and walk-ons. It can drift into a nightmare or transform for a minute into a lucid dream. The parts are traded. It’s difficult to know whose shoes one would put on and walk in when wakening. Mixed puzzles with amorphous shapes are hard to assemble.

  21. poignantly beautiful poem from Carol…and a wonderful share from yourself, Pooja…🤍

    1. Thanks, I’m happy to share it.

  22. Love the tapestry metaphor – we’re all a woven masterpiece! Yay you! xx

  23. Carol Anne writes such deep, beautiful poetry. Courageous of her to share her journey with the world. 🙏

    1. She does and she is definitely courageous.

  24. Brilliant poetry by a gorgeous soul, Carol anne <3 & Thank you, Pooja for highlighting such a beautiful talent!

    1. Thanks, I’m more than happy to share it!

  25. Sublime and powerful poetry.

    1. Thank you so much.

      1. You’re welcome.

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