How To Write A Book

First, find a comfy nook

Sit down with the laptop

Switch it on and get ready to type

But first go get some tea

And your favourite comfy hoodie

Sit back down

Now you’re comfortable and warm

But did you leave the oven on?

Go check the oven

And fix yourself some snacks while you’re at it

Play with the cat for a few hours

Make your dinner

Maybe some more tea

Switch off the laptop and head to bed

Tomorrow you’ll definitely write that book


Wait… did you think this would be actual advice on how to write a book?? Do you not know me at all? Wowwww…

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84 thoughts on “How To Write A Book

  1. How did you know??🤣 I have very good intentions on the events of the day and the wind can blow or the sun will shine and I’m distracted🤦🏽‍♀️

  2. The procrastination is real! 😂
    This is me every day. The only difference is I end up playing with my dog instead cuz I don’t have a cat.

  3. Thoroughly enjoyed reading the post! 😀

    I have done almost everything mentioned in this wonderful post.

  4. Sounds about right, only maybe more for me it would be play with the dog x 6. He loves to play, he’s a cheeky little guy but when you engage him you can see him go through this kind of “ah heck, I didn’t think I’d get this far” haha.

    I have thought about writing a book before but it’s just never really interested me. Books often sound like a lot of work for something that may or may not sell. I prefer to take risks on things that I know are more likely to work haha.

    1. Aww he sounds adorable and like a great distraction lol!

      Haha that’s fair. Writing a book is most definitely a lot of work.

  5. Hahaha. You know it is said some poets write their poems when they were sleeping, for example, Samuel Taylor Coleridge. Writing short stories and short essays is much easier than writing a big book. And it is all in our mind. I guess finding what really makes one tickle is really important and the book has to exist in our mind first before it shows up in the digital form. LOL.

    1. Oh wow that’s so interesting. True shorter things are significantly easier to write. I think everything exists in my mind but I can’t seem to get it down on paper lol.

  6. I kept on scrolling waiting for a twist (actual advice) 😂 I do love tea, I’ll continue to sip till I come around to actually write the book😂❤️❤️

  7.     I’m glad to know that tomorrow I’ll definitely write that book. Thanks for the encouragement. But I think I’ll need coffee with my snacks. And now I’ll have to look up that expression I used to know “every nook and cranny”.
        I’ve always liked plan A procrastination and hope, knowing that it’s going to be a great book, because it was in a dream and it felt like the characters in the dream liked it, except that the dream script writer is in my brain somewhere and though it seems like a separate person, it still belongs to me but plays hide-and-go-seek like a child during the day.
        Plan B, the outline outlier. Nook-type tea is a soothing outline for a poem tome to be owned or not to be owned. A few stacks of paper can be pushed aside gracefully for the snacks because potato chips are greasy and you wouldn’t want to get grease on your papers.
        Plan C, rhymes. The archives have poems that rhyme with “C”. Indeed.
        “How to write a poem…” I used to know this. I’ve forgotten. Remind me.
        Cat? Wait, wasn’t that a play — “Cat on a Hot Tin Roof” (Tennessee Williams)
        I’d add to these instructions to get the cat off the roof, and the buns out of the oven.

  8. Why does this feel like the story of my life whenever I need to get work done?😅😅
    Quite relatable and funny. Love this.

  9. Lol like the “Procrastination” episode of Spongebob. Me all day. I SHOULD be writing or exercising for an impending white water rafting trip. Instead I’m cleaning (and reading your post 🤣). I only clean when it’s the lesser of multiple, greater procrastinate-able tasks 😝

  10. Ahaha I have always wanted to write a book (one day…) and I am almost 100% that my attempt will go EXACTLY like this! Thanks for the laughs! Hope you are doing well! 😊

  11. I’m currently actually working on a book right now and I saw this and was like “oh this will be so helpful!” Not really, but it’s something better! It’s really funny!

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