The Bane Of My Existence

You quickly went from being

The love of my life

To being

The bane of my existence

How sweet love is

Where it is new

And yet over time

It does not always get better

Like wine

Sometimes it starts to rot

Especially when held too tight

When it should be discarded

It’s not poetry Tuesdays if I’m not talking about how relationships are stupid. Just kidding, I’m sure many are great. As you know, I just happen to be a chronic pessimist. It is a gift and a curse. By which I mean it is absolutely not a gift and mostly a curse.

Onto this poem. I recently watched the entire season 1 of The Watchful Eye. If you haven’t seen it yet, good for you. It’s awful. Seriously, don’t waste your time. It’s like the dollar store version of Only Murders In The Building. Anyway, a part of the last episode of season 1 inspired this poem. Watching the disaster of a last episode was the cherry on top of a crappy day. But on a more positive note, I hear the next season of OMITB is coming out soon and has so many amazing guest stars. Including the very talented and gorgeous Paul Rudd, so I am extremely excited for that as you can imagine!

What did you think of “The Bane Of My Existence?” Have you watched The Watchful Eye? What are you watching right now? Let m know in the comments below because I would love to hear from you! Or you can simply stop by and say hi!

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100 thoughts on “The Bane Of My Existence

  1. I love love love Only Murders in the Building!!! My favorite binge. Can’t wait for the new season! Some relationships are great, others, challenging, while others horrifying. It is what it is.

  2. I’ve how to play 2 out of 3 ain’t bad, over the last few weeks.
    I remember breaking up with someone, or them breaking up with me, and deciding almost immediately to cut off from them entirely and any mutual friends who were less than helpful. I don’t think that was how she and friends planned it, but I was so shaken to my soul I was determined never to hate or devalue what we had had.
    Now, to tell you the truth… I am ambivalent. I couldn’t care much either way. After that, I had a few women try to get involved and it was too early and I really didn’t feel like it. One of the last things I said when I got dumped by someone I loved and trusted (who tried using my brother’s death as some sort of non-consensual “humiliation or degradation play” it came out of nowhere for me)… I told her I am so much happier alone, and have always been happy competently looking after myself.
    I think a lot of people are very dependent on having a “good job” and appearing a particular way.

    1. That’s true, a lot of people want to look a certain way to others. I think being happy on our own first is the best. That way we’re happy with or without someone.

  3. I think most people mistake attachment for true love. When we first are attracted to someone, and they respond in kind, a host of chemicals generated in our bodies creates an addictive response much like what a drug addict would experience. The purpose is to create an intense temporary bond that lasts long enough for procreation. In our modern world, that gets interrupted due to birth control, so the next stages of bonding do not happen. After a while, those chemical responses become less effective, and like the addict, we enter depression and crave another experience to start the cycle again. True love is a selfless act of caring and respect that mutually benefits the relationship. I believe true love can be taught with lessons in trust, respect, and integrity and developed through shared goals and experiences.
    Or true love could come from a kiss from a prince charming
    And they lived happily ever after…. 😊

    1.     There does seem to be a bias in the media for extremes of nonspiritual rational-analytical, or of mindless ‘magic’. Even a search for the hormone “oxytocin” yields two very different attitudes: one practical-rational and the other vague or unknown. One result emphasizes its effect in uterine contractions and child birth, the other casually mentions its effect in the brain which is involved in “romantic attachment, parent-infant bonding, trust, recognition, and sexual arousal.”
          In the world of science and medicine, the totally physical approach is a problem. You can see that in a lab rat. They once did an experiment where they put an electrode in the “pleasure center” of the rat’s brain and attached it to a stimulator with a push button that the rat could operate to stimulate itself. It lost interest in all social activity with other rats including sex. It lost interest in eating. It only spent time pushing the button.
          So science looks at us as lab rats who only respond to hormones and triggering cues. No free-will, but just a biochemical machine like AI except using the algorithms of chemical reactions and nerve-net firings controlled by the math and physics of it all.
          On the other hand, when it come to how hormones affect the brain and “the self” they throw up their hands and basically have no answer but to say in effect that it’s magic.

      1. P.S. Your idea of “shared goals and experiences” seems to make sense as a beginning point. Our animal instinct heritage, unfortunately seems to lead us astray and away from our Higher Values which one would hope would be a better mixture of rational, emotional, and spiritual dimensions. The animal instincts seem to be that the stereotypical male looks for a healthy women who can nurture his child and carry on his genes, and the stereotypical female looks for someone who can protect her while she raises the child. I would hope that humans are more than just animals.

    2. Yes, I learnt about that in psychology. That’s why a lot of relationships don’t work out. People expect it to be that way forever but that’s not how it is. For relationships to last you need to genuinely like the person not just be attracted to them physically. And of course, there’s always Prince Charming to save you if everything else goes wrong 😅

  4. This poem again confirms that a writer can get inspiration from anything in the surrounding.
    Yes, love sometimes can become a bane of existence. It’s better to let go then, instead of holding on any longer.

  5. There are a lot of wines that rot and turn into vinegar with age.

    I like the poem, but I can’t relate because I’m not and never been in a relationship.

  6. Beautiful poem

    I love how smoothly you can write a blog, and then write a poem, then something entirely different.

    Don’t lose hope, there’s always hope, haha!!
    PS- Check mailbox

  7. How sweet your wine, and I
    drank of you until you whined
    and dined with another who was
    more into your music, your food,

    oh jealousy, it is a vinegar that
    only goes well with food, and

    when I can not dine with you, I
    am lost, and I think
    I need a diet

    there was a riot in a ‘Diet’ once,
    a legislature of love gone to the birds

    And when I hear the chirping,
    I don’t think of you in the same way anymore

    It is a sadness to see less.

  8. You minimize being in stupid relationships if you exit them as soon as you know they are stupid. Too much time is wasted maintaining the bad out of habit, guilt, laziness, or a fanciful notion that the unfixable can be fixed.

  9. I get a small amount of pleasure from watching bad shows and movies while making fun of them in my head, maybe I should check that one out lol. I don’t know if it’s just because I’ve seen so many movies but it’s incredibly difficult for me to find something that’s good.

    1. Lol bad movies are fun to watch sometimes. I used to watch a lot of horrible horror movies but stopped after I accidentally shaved off my eyebrow while laughing during watching one.

        1. I wrote about it a while back 😅 Basically, I was shaping my eyebrows with one of those tiny eyebrow razors and the horror movie was so ridiculous I burst out laughing and in the process managed to shave half of my eyebrow off. It still hasn’t fully grown back 🥲

  10. Haven’t watched either of those shows. I see ‘Watchful Eye’ has pretty low ratings from critics too.

    Right now we’re watching ‘Peaky Blinders’ which we’re enjoying a lot.

      1. Yeah we tend to watch one series until we complete it. One year over Christmas holidays we binge-watched ‘Six Feet Under’ from 10 am to midnight! LOL

  11. Relationships?😶‍🌫️🤐

    Not watched much this year outside anime on weekends off. I watched Wednesday (that was this year, right?), plus a few Disney animated movies. I really miss a good horror, oh, I did watch Guillermo del Toro’s cabinet of mysteries(was that this year too?) And a series called Chucky recently (2seasons)

    1. I absolutely loved Wednesday and I started watching Guillermo del Toro’s cabinet of mysteries but didn’t love it. I felt like it was so focused on violence that they forgot to add substance to the stories.

        1. Yes, the dialogue was really good and I enjoyed that. If the story had a little more essence it would have been fantastic paired with the dialogue.

          1. Yap, I guess that wasn’t the intention because Guillermo and all the directors of those episodes can certainly tell good stories when they want to. But you’re so right, it would have been epic, though it is hard to squeeze too much essence in one short episode.🙏🏾

  12. I tried to watch OMITB when it first started. I couldn’t get into it. I may have to go back and try again…If you like it, then I’ll give it a second shot! lol

  13. When love is new that’s all that matters but with time we start looking for the “more” in our partners and sometimes that doesn’t end well.

    I haven’t watched The Watchful Eye.

    Am currently watching NCIS Hawai’i, The Equalizer and just started following Love is Blind season 4.😄

  14. I am watching well just finished watching The Last of Us on HBO max. I’m one of the ones who played the game, so I knew basically what was going to happen. The show did a great job of adapting to the game. The best game to show I have ever seen.

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