I was recently chatting with Stephanie from Singing Gecko on one of her posts. And she mentioned my comment was Stoic and optimistic and I absolutely loved that. But before I go into this story, I want to take a minute to shoutout Stephanie. She is such a cool person. Her posts really make me think and she has an awesome vibe. Do check out her blog. Okay, now back to how Stoicism saved my mental health.
Basically her comment reminded me that I am in fact a Stoic and have practised Stoicism for years now. I first learnt about it in my first year of university when I took a philosophy course. It really stood out to me because it was the first time I had heard a philosophical school of thought that perfectly encompassed my own beliefs. And the more I read about it, the more I agreed with what I was reading.
Over time, I began to include Stoic practices in my life and saw a major shift in my mental health. But first, let’s talk about Stoicism. I’m sure most people that know are interested in philosophy or know basic philosophical schools will be familiar with Stoicism. But for those that may not be, I’ve shared a little bit about Stoicism and a Wikipedia link if you would like to read more about it.
What Is Stoicism?
“Stoicism is a school of Hellenistic philosophy that flourished in Ancient Greece and Ancient Rome. The Stoics believed that the practice of virtue is enough to achieve eudaimonia: a well-lived life. The Stoics identified the path to achieving it with a life spent practicing the four cardinal virtues in everyday life — prudence, fortitude, temperance, and justice — as well as living in accordance with nature. It was founded in the ancient Agora of Athens by Zeno of Citium around 300 BCE.
Alongside Aristotle’s ethics, the Stoic tradition forms one of the major founding approaches to virtue ethics. The Stoics are especially known for teaching that “virtue is the only good” for human beings, and that external things, such as health, wealth, and pleasure, are not good or bad in themselves (adiaphora) but have value as “material for virtue to act upon”.
Many Stoics—such as Seneca and Epictetus—emphasized that because “virtue is sufficient for happiness”, a sage would be emotionally resilient to misfortune. The Stoics also believed that certain destructive emotions resulted from errors of judgment, and people should aim to maintain a will (called prohairesis) that is “in accordance with nature”. Because of this, the Stoics thought the best indication of an individual’s philosophy was not what a person said but how the person behaved.
To live a good life, one had to understand the rules of the natural order since they believed everything was rooted in nature.”
(Source: Wikipedia)
How Stoicism Saved My Mental Health
So, now that you have a better understanding of Stoicism we can get into how Stoicism saved my mental health and has pretty much changed my life over the last few years. For those of you that don’t know, I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety as a teenager. So that’s what I’ll be referencing throughout the post. Anyway, this is how Stoicism saved my mental health:
Acceptance
One major aspect of Stoicism is that Stoics believe that we have free will but also that there are things out of our control. Basically, we believe in destiny, that things are pre-determined. However, how we choose to perceive things is up to us. Realising this was a giant game changer for me.
Growing up, I was always someone that needed control. I like things to be perfect, everything has its place. When things don’t go exactly as planned and even if there’s a slight hitch I would go into absolute anxiety mode. However, I have become so much more calm now when things don’t go as planned. Of course, I’m not perfect at it and I don’t think perfection is achievable. But I accept things that come my way. I experience the negative emotions associated with it and then I process and let them go. I don’t let it debilitate me.
This has been a huge game changer for my anxiety. I’m no longer meticulously plan every tiny aspect of my life because I’m terrified I’ll do something wrong if I don’t. Can you imagine how exhausting it was for me to be doing that before? But no more. Now, I let life do its thing because I understand that being on anxiety mode 24/7 is not going to change my destiny. But how I choose to react will. I control what I can and I accept what I can’t
Stoic Exercises/Practices
There are a number of Stoic practices that those that believe in Stoicism try to include into their life. Today, I want to talk about two that I practice that have helped me so much with my mental health.
The first one is negative visualisation. This is a technique where you periodically imagine losing the things you value (like your job, health, or loved ones). I know, this sounds super grim and trust me it’s not for everyone. But hear me out. This made my life so much easier and decreased my anxiety immensely. I used to be so anxious all the time about bad things happening. Losing people I love, losing my health, not doing well in school, losing clients etc. But this practice has helped me picture the worst again and again until it’s no longer as anxiety inducing for me. I have finally come to terms with the fact that it’s a part of life that sometimes we do lose things we value. But we can’t let that stop us, we have to stay strong and keep going even when we hit rock bottom.
Another practice that I have added to my routine is voluntary discomfort. Stoics often engage in practices that voluntarily make life harder to build resilience and remind themselves that discomfort is not inherently bad. Earlier, when my anxiety was at its worst any sort of discomfort would ruin my day and I would shy away from it. I realised that this was actually a trauma response.
For me, voluntary discomfort is about doing social things because that makes me very uncomfortable. A few years ago, even leaving the house would give me anxiety. Now, I go out all the time. Sometimes on my own just to have a relaxing mental health day. I’m no longer scared to dine alone, shop alone, talk to new people. Things that would have petrified me have now become enjoyable.
Courage
This was a big one for me and one that was a major trigger for my depression. I’ve always been one of those people that are extremely sensitive to fighting or confrontation. That’s a huge trigger for my PTSD. But I’m also someone that takes their morals and ethics really seriously. When someone does something I believe is wrong or harming someone else, I feel unsettled. But I would never confront people about their behaviour before. Especially narcissists. Now, I’m not longer afraid of confrontation. I still avoid it when I can but when I need to say something, I do it.
Acting in accordance with virtue, even in the face of adversity is an important part of Stoicism. And it’s what taught me to stand up for myself and those that couldn’t stand up for themselves. I’m really proud of how far I’ve come. And thanks to no longer bottling everything up and setting healthy boundaries, my depression and anxiety have gotten so much better. Instead of being depressed that the world sucks, I can now stand up and fight for things to get better.
Moderation and Neutrality
Exercising moderation in all things and avoiding excess is another things I learnt from Stoicism. I used to see things as very black and white before I began actively practicing Stoicism. And that was a really depressing way to see the world. It made me very pessimistic and unhappy.
Now, I understand that things are much more complex. Nothing is black and white, most things are grey. Which is why it’s important to try to stay neutral and objective. Don’t get to a place where you’re on an unrealistic extreme.
As for moderation, I think I’ve generally been a pretty moderate person but over time I have become much less materialistic. I was never that materialistic but I did like occasionally to splurge on things I was interested in like books, skincare, makeup etc. Now, I put a lot more importance on people and memories instead of stuff.
The Bigger Picture
One thing I did a lot of reading and reflecting about is living according to nature. For Stoics, this means understanding the natural world and our place within it. It involves recognising that life is unpredictable and transient. Change is a constant part of it. And that is why it’s so important to learn to accept that and be prepared instead of holding on to the past.
Figuring out my place in the world also helped me recognise just how insignificant I am. Which again, I know sounds a little depressing but it wasn’t for me. It had the opposite effect. I was no longer insecure about those little flaws I saw in the mirror, about my weight, my hair, my body. Because none of that mattered and most people probably didn’t even notice or care about those things. I was just a tiny part of a big world. This did wonders for my social anxiety.
Constant Growth
Wisdom and understanding what is truly important in life is one of the cornerstones of Stoicism. Stoics often practice mindfulness and reflection. Regularly reflecting on your thoughts, actions, and responses helps Stoics become more self-aware. This practice encourages us to examine our judgments and adjust them to align with virtue.
I’ve talked about meditation, mindfulness and reflection quite a lot in my mental health related posts so I won’t go into too much detail again on this one. The post has already become so much longer than I expected it to be. But basically, reflecting on my day and trying to be a better version of myself each day has helped me immensely with my mental health. It’s helped me understand myself and those around me. And most importantly, it’s helped me become a better person which in turn makes me a lot more confident than I used to be. I know what I stand for and don’t look to others to define me.
Final Thoughts
That’s how Stoicism saved my mental health and helped me be the person I’ve become today. I hope you enjoyed this post. I don’t talk about my philosophical beliefs much because I feel like people wouldn’t care too much or would maybe not find that interesting. People that love philosophy love it but those that don’t really don’t. But since a lot of my readers do enjoy my mental health related posts, I thought this would be interesting to them. And maybe a different perspective because I don’t see many people talking about Stoicism in relation to mental health. But for me the two are interrelated and it was important for me to tell my story of how Stoicism saved my mental health.
Are you a Stoic? What are your thoughts on Stoicism? Should I share a list of books that are free on Amazon about Stoicism? What schools of philosophy do you find yourself most aligned with? Let me know in the comments section located below. Or simply stop by and say hi!
Disclaimer: If you or someone you love are experiencing mental health problems please talk to a professional or someone you trust. Please seek help if you feel that it is necessary. There is absolutely nothing wrong with needing help.
If you would like to read more mental health related posts click here.
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