Lifesfinewhine

The Life & Ramblings Of A Zillennial

The Narcissist

Mirror, mirror on the wall

Who’s the pettiest of them all?

Why you, the narcissist of course!

She smiled at the answer

Knowing she had done

Her chores for the day

Manipulation? Check!

Lying? Check!

Playing victim? Check!

As she stared at herself in the mirror

Mesmerised and enchanted by her own perfection

She realised that as long as the mirror existed

There would be a copy of herself on it

And she couldn’t have that

So she destroyed the very thing she loved

This wasn’t the first time

And surely it wouldn’t be the last

The Narcissist

About The Narcissist:

This poem was inspired by Kevin’s No Theme Thursday prompt for the week. He has so many great images as always this week and this one in particular really grabbed my attention. You can check out all his prompts here.

I don’t know if any of you have ever dealt with a narcissist before but it is absolutely exhausting and draining. They destroy everything in their path and hurt those closest to them more than anyone. And the sad part is that they don’t even feel any guilt for the damage they cause because they don’t feel empathy the way “normal” people do. Or even gratitude for all that others have done for them. It hurts, it hurts a lot. And that pain is what inspired this poem.

Have you ever dealt with a narcissist? If so, do you have any advice for someone recovering from narcissistic abuse? Let me know in the comments below. Or simply stop by and say hi!

I recently published my first book and would be honoured if you took a minute to check it out here.

If you enjoyed this post don’t forget to like, follow, share and comment!

Enjoyed this post? Then follow me on social media:

Twitter Instagram Pinterest LinkedIn HubPages

Email me on(guest posts welcome!): insomniacwithanaccent@gmail.com

Lifesfinewhine Services

Share This Post On:

Posted by:

P. J. Gudka

105 responses to “The Narcissist”

  1. aquinoaa2272 Avatar
    aquinoaa2272

    Very well written, I can really relate to this. I have two ex-wives and ex fiancé and 27 years of experience, living with narcissists.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Unfortunately, some people are just magnets for narcissists and it really sucks.

      Reply
      1. aquinoaa2272 Avatar
        aquinoaa2272

        In an empath and we are the most desirable to narcissists.

        Reply
        1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
          P. J. Gudka

          Yeah, they specifically target empaths.

          Reply
  2. John Avatar
    John

    That’s kind of irritating to read, and it’s because of the narcissist tone. I’ve dealt with these people, I just wanted to run away! 😂

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Yesss unfortunately most of us know one or two people like this!

      Reply
  3. Kevin Avatar
    Kevin

    I find the workplace variety to be the most fun to deal with, personally. More than a few of them at almost every job these days. Well done, Pooja! Love it!

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Oh absolutely, they are quite prevalent in work places. Thanks!

      Reply
  4. Tamara Kulish from https://tamarakulish.com/ Avatar
    Tamara Kulish from https://tamarakulish.com/

    I’ve learned that they won’t change, ever. No matter how much time, love and effort we put in. I’ve learned that it’s best to identify them early and then keep them on the periphery and not allow them into the inner part of my life. They will break havoc, but they can do so elsewhere. I’m not sacrificing myself anymore to help them. They walk out at the end strong and the same, whilst their partner is depleted.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Yes, they don’t change and only pretend to be better when they see you pulling away. Keeping our distance is best. It seems narcissism is on the rise so knowing how to spot them early on is helpful, I’m sure.

      Reply
  5. WellsFiction Avatar
    WellsFiction

    Oh yes. I know plenty of narcissist. Worst of all is the blame they push on you. Nice poem Pooja. Hope you’re doing well friend.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Yes, somehow they are always the victim. It’s really a struggle dealing with people that never see their own faults. I am, thanks so much and hope you’re doing well too.

      Reply
  6. Alex Diaz-Granados Avatar
    Alex Diaz-Granados

    My half-sister is a narcissist.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      That’s awful, it’s even worse when they’re part of our family.

      Reply
      1. Alex Diaz-Granados Avatar
        Alex Diaz-Granados

        It is, indeed, awful. I have not seen my “halfie” in nine years, nor have I contacted her since. It sucks, but I take my mental health seriously.

        Reply
        1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
          P. J. Gudka

          Yeah, we have to put ourselves first. And narcissists will always find a way to take advantage of you. Regardless of how much we try, we can’t make them good people.

          Reply
          1. Alex Diaz-Granados Avatar
            Alex Diaz-Granados

            Right? It’s like trying to bail out the Titanic with a drinking cup. Or something along those lines.

            The estrangement does hurt, though. Especially since our birthdays are only five days apart.

            Reply
            1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
              P. J. Gudka

              Yup, that is so accurate. I’m so sorry to hear that and I know exactly how you feel.

              Reply
  7. ianscyberspace Avatar
    ianscyberspace

    A needed topic to consider in today’s society

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Yes, unfortunately narcissism is on the rise and we need to be on the lookout.

      Reply
  8. noga noga Avatar
    noga noga

    💕🙌👍

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      😊💕

      Reply
  9. trE Avatar
    trE

    A narcissist can make you lose your sanity. It’s too much work trying to be in a narcissistic person’s life. 🥺

    “I don’t know if any of you have ever dealt with a narcissist before but it is absolutely exhausting and draining. They destroy everything in their path and hurt those closest to them more than anyone. And the sad part is that they don’t even feel any guilt for the damage they cause because they don’t feel empathy the way “normal” people do. Or even gratitude for all that others have done for them. It hurts, it hurts a lot. And that pain is what inspired this poem.”

    The poem, though . . . is such a great descriptive of what one deals with as it pertains to narcissism and you did a great job with it!

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Yes, we literally start doubting ourselves and even our own reality. It’s genuinely terrifying dealing with narcissists. Thank you so much!

      Reply
  10. Stephanie (singing gecko) Avatar
    Stephanie (singing gecko)

    It’s awful, but there’s such strength in your writing about this lately: boundaries, boundaries, boundaries!

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Yes, it’s genuinely awful but boundaries help so much! In a way it’s the only thing that we can do to protect ourselves.

      Reply
      1. Stephanie Avatar
        Stephanie

        <3

        Reply
  11. L.G. Avatar
    L.G.

    Great poetry and realness as always, you are a voice in this world.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thank you so much, really kind of you to say that.

      Reply
  12. Mark Edward Jabbour Avatar
    Mark Edward Jabbour

    Wow! Hang in there.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thank you, trying my best!

      Reply
  13. Darryl B Avatar
    Darryl B

    Pooja, I really like your interpretation of Kevin’s picture. Not only the concept…but the impactful words that say so much with so little. 🎯😎❤️👏

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thank you so much, as soon as I saw that image this poem started forming 😊

      Reply
  14. Leigh Anne Avatar
    Leigh Anne

    Wonderful, Pooja! And truth!!

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thank you!

      Reply
  15. Milena Alien Avatar
    Milena Alien

    This is a very good question about narcissism, I think I know one or two people like that. The worst part of it is that they are complete oblivious about the damage that they cause. As they see the world through a different lens and if you start telling them about it they would deny what seems to be the core of the problem. Because blind people don’t see the colors, they can’t.
    I don’t have any good advice as for those who survived the narcissistic attacks, with Craig David I wanna sing: I’m walking away from troubles in my life…

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Unfortunately, it seems most of us know at least one or two people like that. They’re oblivious to the damage they cause because it seems their perception of reality is not the same as the rest of us. In their reality, they’re always the victim and anything that threatens that narrative is seen as a threat.
      Walking away is the best thing to do when it comes to narcissism.

      Reply
      1. Milena Alien Avatar
        Milena Alien

        I think it’s true, yes, walking away is the only thing left

        Reply
  16. Ranjana Avatar
    Ranjana

    Unfortunately I was in a relationship with a covert narcissist before Covid. But thanks to the lockdown some of its impact washed off me as I was living with my family at the time. The struggle is in the head making you feel so insecure that you forget who you are or were before meeting them. Narcissists are like Dodder a parasitic annual plant that infests many crops, native plants, and weeds. They can survive for several days attaching themselves to the host plant and spreading to other plants near them, forming a dense mat, ultimately leading to cutting the complete vegetation to get rid of them. I highly recommend listening to the expert advice of DoctorRamani on her YouTube channel to start your healing journey.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      That’s awful, I’m so sorry you experienced that. I feel like covert/vulnerable narcissists are even worse because it’s hard to see the red flags. I’m so glad you got out of it though. I’m already subscribed to Dr. Ramani and her videos are super helpful for sure.

      Reply
  17. Joseph Glidden Avatar
    Joseph Glidden

    Great poem. I don’t know if I have ever dealt with a clinically diagnosed narcissistic person, but I have come across some extremely self centered people. Is that similar?

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      It’s really rare to meet someone that’s diagnosed with narcissism simply because they rarely go to a professional as they don’t see their own wrongdoings and have a warped perception of reality. And when they do go to a professional that can diagnose them, they often only tell them their side of the story where they are the victim instead of what really happened which makes it hard to diagnose them or even see that they’re narcissists. It’s often only those around them that see them without their mask that know they’re narcissists. Although being self-centred is a narcissistic trait it’s not the same as narcissistic personality disorder which is a lot worse.

      Reply
      1. Joseph Glidden Avatar
        Joseph Glidden

        Very interesting.

        Reply
        1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
          P. J. Gudka

          It is, I’ve been reading up on it and watching videos about narcissism which is really interesting but also validating.

          Reply
  18. shivatje Avatar
    shivatje

    🙏🌹

    Aum Shanti

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      🙏🙏

      Reply
  19. katiemiafrederick Avatar
    katiemiafrederick

    SMiLes Dear Pooja Growing Up in a small
    Neighborhood Some of The Kids had very
    Cold Parents in the Home Occasionally

    They Would Come to my Home
    Crying for the Touch of my Mother

    Sort of Like Tonight at Walmart a 3 Year
    Old Child or So Smiling at my Wife Reaching
    Out to Her Just Passing by my Wife Reaching

    Out Her Hand to Wave the Small Child Grabbing

    Her Finger
    And Her
    Mother Telling
    the Child Sorry
    She Can’t Come With us

    Indeed i Understand the
    Empty Place in the Case Study
    For the Disorder at Hand for a So
    Called Leader at the Bottom of the Top

    In Currently a Least
    Favored Nation

    For Now

    i Feel
    What’s
    MiSSinG

    That Sadly
    Is a Jug of
    Water With No Bottom

    True Born or Raised without

    A Real
    Touch
    oF LoVE iN

    Peace

    to See and Be
    A Living Human
    Soul With A Touch
    oF LoVE iN Peace For All More

    Than Any Tower Will Ever Build Above

    Below
    With
    SMiLes..:)

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Yes, unfortunately a lot of narcissists can be very cold parents and due to that their kids often end up having narcissistic traits too as a result of emotional neglect. It’s a really sad cycle. Narcissism is on the rise and that shows a lot in politics and who people choose to elect.

      Reply
      1. katiemiafrederick Avatar
        katiemiafrederick

        Yeah everyday
        Now “The Circus”
        Gets More Bizarre

        With Wide
        Ranging
        Consequences
        Even in Kenya

        As i Understand
        Now Dear Pooja

        The Most Marginalized
        And Vulnerable Face

        THE Most
        Consequences
        Of Evil Ignorance… 👿

        Reply
        1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
          P. J. Gudka

          Yes, the ignorance and hate is everywhere. It’s awful.

          Reply
          1. katiemiafrederick Avatar
            katiemiafrederick

            Indeed…

            Reply
  20. Sadje Avatar
    Sadje

    You’ve captured the psyche of a narcissist so well.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thank you, unfortunately I have a lot of experience with it.

      Reply
      1. Sadje Avatar
        Sadje

        It is very sad to have a narcissist in your circle of family or friends

        Reply
        1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
          P. J. Gudka

          Yes, it makes things very complicated.

          Reply
          1. Sadje Avatar
            Sadje

            I understand

            Reply
  21. Opher Avatar
    Opher

    Narcissists rule.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Yes, unfortunately they do very well in positions of power.

      Reply
  22. Bookstooge Avatar
    Bookstooge

    Sorry to hear you are having to deal with this type of situation. It’s stuff like this that makes me glad I do what I do for work. I have to deal with one other person throughout the day and that is pretty much it…

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thanks so much. I’m really fortunate to have lovely clients so even though I do deal with a lot of people I’ve never had issues with any of them. The person I’m having issues with is in my inner circle which makes it more difficult to set boundaries.

      Reply
  23. utahan15 Avatar
    utahan15

    a flower
    wo true power
    and destroyed
    lookin at self
    even in death
    wo baited breaths

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Yes, some people only look at themselves their whole lives. It’s very sad actually.

      Reply
      1. utahan15 Avatar
        utahan15

        it is.

        Reply
  24. Dawn Avatar
    Dawn

    I’m grateful the ones I’ve encountered weren’t ever in my close circles, and easier to disconnect from. Well-penned poem, Pooja….sad reality that they usually destroy the things they love and that could have loved them.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      That’s really lucky, when they’re in your inner circle it’s so much more difficult to set boundaries. Thank you so much and that’s very much the sad reality of it.

      Reply
  25. byngnigel Avatar
    byngnigel

    Yeah.. one of my previous relationsislps. It was exhausting. They do lack empathy and the best decision one can make is to walk away from them and never look back.
    I loved your poem btw, PoojaG. The NTT can be so much fun when I get to participate. 😊

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      It can definitely be exhausting and draining, I’m sorry to hear you’ve experienced dealing with a narcissist too. Walking away is pretty much the only way to protect ourselves from them.
      Thank you and yes Kevin is always comes up with such great prompt images, it’s nice to be participate when we can 😊

      Reply
  26. Eugi Avatar
    Eugi

    I can relate, Pooja. I remember dealing with these types in the workplace. Your poem is spot on.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Yes, unfortunately many of us deal with them at some point and it can be really frustrating. Thank you.

      Reply
      1. Eugi Avatar
        Eugi

        You’re welcome, Pooja.

        Reply
  27. Christopher Hall Avatar
    Christopher Hall

    I’m so very sorry that you’ve even had to experience this in your life. 🥺 I wish no one else would have to because, I’ve been through that battlefield myself. I know the pain too well. It’s costs you almost everything.

    Because I know everyone’s experiences are different, I’ll just say for me, the costs came with extreme pain (to put it lightly), and slowly you start to lose yourself, and start to become even more like the narcissist in different ways by developing their traits over time. And, that can in turn have consequences for how you interact with the world and how you’re effecting the lives of other people. It can also drive you psychologically insane, and can be a catalyst for spiraling yourself into self-harm through addiction like it did for me too.

    Besides the extremely important foundational advice like maintaining distance, and getting help from the situation, I think educating ourselves on their disorder, can be extremely empowering for helping victims understand their perpetrators patterns of behavior. That way they can try to stay more steps ahead of them if they can’t currently get out of the situation. And, it also helps give us a better chance to stay away from them in the future.

    As for you Pooj, I’m glad that you’re doing so much better with your inner self care. And, not letting anyone or anything take you away from yourself. And, finally, I apologize for this ridiculously long comment. I know you’re so busy as it is, and I hate taking up more of your precious time. Your poem summarized the narcissistic psyche extremely well! 👍💕😊

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thank you so much. Yes, it’s incredibly painful but unfortunately narcissists are everywhere and actually on the rise so most of us have had to deal with them at some point.

      Yes, you start losing yourself and doubting your own reality due to all the lying and manipulation. It makes it so much harder to heal and get better. And some do turn to addiction and self-harm. I’m so sorry you experienced that but so glad you’re better now.

      Absolutely, educating ourselves about the disorder and focusing on healing and finding ourselves helps a lot.

      Thank you and I actually really appreciate you sharing your experience because it helps validate how I feel and it’s always nice to know we’re not alone 💗

      Reply
      1. Christopher Hall Avatar
        Christopher Hall

        Not shockingly, I agree with everything you’ve said here! I really appreciate your very kind words as always. This world may have some cruel and cold paths along the way, but we’re definitely not alone in walking those paths. I love hearing your voice out here! 💕💖

        Reply
        1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
          P. J. Gudka

          Thank you and yes absolutely, there’s lots of wonderful people out there too! 💕

          Reply
  28. Carol Avatar
    Carol

    Nice job Pooja. I feel like everyone in my country is weathering the brunt of at least a few narcissists at the moment.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thank you. Yes, unfortunately narcissists are fantastic at getting themselves into positions of power.

      Reply
  29. Mr. Ohh's Sideways View Avatar
    Mr. Ohh’s Sideways View

    I liked this. Youyr next book should be called “Dark Dreams” and include stuff like this 🤣😎🙃

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Hmmm good idea! 😁

      Reply
  30. Mary K. Doyle Avatar
    Mary K. Doyle

    Your poem is very good, Pooja. Unfortunately, most of us know a narcissist. Have a fabulous day.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thank you so much. Yes, unfortunately so. Have a fabulous day too.

      Reply
  31. Michele Lee Avatar
    Michele Lee

    Oh, this is a powerful one and similar to what Mary wrote, we’ve all had our dealings with narcissistic behavior. Most challenging when we are related, though that should never be a reason to be treated poorly. Toxic treatment is never ok. Best to step away. Best to you, Pooja. 🌺

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thanks so much. So true, unfortunately narcissism is on the rise and most of us have had to deal with at least one or two of them. It’s definitely more difficult when we’re related to them and can’t cut them off completely. Thank you 💗

      Reply
  32. Cabinet Painters Horsham, PA Avatar
    Cabinet Painters Horsham, PA

    This is such a good poem, it’s thought provoking. Thank you for sharing.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thank you so much.

      Reply
  33. Cindy Georgakas Avatar
    Cindy Georgakas

    Why does this sound so familiar…. lol.. maybe because we’re being led by one in our country at the moment.. (U.S. I mean amongst others).
    Easy when you can just walk away.. not so much when they are related. Check…. case in point.
    Here’s the thing, they haven’t a clue they are. Check … NOTED!
    “Walk away” of course when you can. “turn up your ear pods… “i’m not listening to you, I’m not listening to you. Chances are pretty good they’ll leave.. 🤣

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Many of our countries are unfortunately. Narcissists often go for positions of power and are prevalent in politics.

      Yes, that’s the issue they see themselves as the victim and never as the one causing problems.

      Lol yes, ignoring them is best when you can’t cut them out!

      Reply
      1. Cindy Georgakas Avatar
        Cindy Georgakas

        For sure and I totally agree.. they won’t notice anyway 🤣

        Reply
  34. jesusluvsall Avatar
    jesusluvsall

    Narcissists are hard to deal with. I have one in my extended family.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      I’m sorry to hear that and yes they can be really difficult to deal with.

      Reply
  35. Steve Avatar
    Steve

    Great and creative response to the prompt!

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thank you so much!

      Reply
      1. Steve Avatar
        Steve

        You’re welcome!

        Reply
  36. Pramod M Avatar
    Pramod M

    Very interesting subject and explained well Pooja👏👏👏 I know very well about this character type persons. full time self appreciation and Ego, I don’t like that, it’s so irritating, I think these type of persons not have any confidence about their skills.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thank you so much. Yes, we all know those kind of people that just sit around stroking their own egos all day. So true, a lot of it stems from their own insecurities.

      Reply
      1. Pramod M Avatar
        Pramod M

        Exactly

        Reply
  37. SiriusSea Avatar
    SiriusSea

    Wow Pooja <3 I'm so sorry! … This is the real "epidemic" … Check out the "Discard Phase" where I dwell! Learn this now and never doubt yourself or your sanity … It's them!!! The only problem is what was stated in the comments above (emotional pain) but having them in your life is truly more painful and dangerous. Save yourself my love! Oh, and life is actually quite nice without them 😉 … You cannot change them, and they only want to take what's yours, so there is no love lost! I have been trying to determine how close to sociopathic are narcissists while teetering with full-blown psychopathy. How can you feel something that an individual so close to you cannot? They are excellent actors / deceivers too! Sounds so simple standing in clarity … but it's a daily battle still! Stay gorgeous, they really hate that (LOLOL) !!!! 😉

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thanks, luckily I’m getting much better at dealing with it. I so agree, narcissism is growing and more and more people are showing signs/symptoms which is so sad. I have definitely distanced myself as much as I possibly can and am tryingly best to focus on healing my own mental health. Yes, they never change or even feel bad for what they’ve done. No point in wasting our energy. Thank you and so true, they hate when we do well without them! 😊

      Reply
      1. SiriusSea Avatar
        SiriusSea

        Yes! … and here’s a quote for “them”: You hate, while I be great! 😀 This concept was so hard for me to understand likely because I was groomed to be an empath, but my independent Taurus spirit took a buck-wild turn of defiance (haha). Did you know Easter this year is on your birthday !!? It’s going to be crazy-good-fun (manifesting for you) !!! 😀

        Reply
        1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
          P. J. Gudka

          Yesss absolutely! I can so relate as an empath and fellow Taurus. I noticed that, I’m so excited for my bday/Easter- it’ll be extra fun 😁

          Reply
  38. pk world 🌎 Avatar
    pk world 🌎

    Well written 💯

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thank you 💕

      Reply
  39. Laura Avatar
    Laura

    Oh, this was so good 👏 👏 I love this image for it too 💕

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thanks so much, I saw the image and was like yup haha! 💕

      Reply
  40. LaDonna Remy Avatar
    LaDonna Remy

    This truly captures the narcissist. Nicely written.

    Reply
    1. P. J. Gudka Avatar
      P. J. Gudka

      Thank you so much.

      Reply

Leave a Reply

Find Me On Socials!

Check Out My Book:

All The Words I Kept Inside By P. J. Gudka

Discover more from Lifesfinewhine

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading