Some Announcements And Opportunities

Some Announcements And Opportunities

What’s Going On

I want to start by saying that I promise this will be the last random post I make and from tomorrow I will go back to posting actual posts like I used to. I just wanted to talk to you guys about a couple of things going on with my blog for the next few months so you guys stay in the loop.

University

My university is going to be starting soon- from 11th January- and since this is my fourth year it’s going to be a lot more difficult than the last three years as the work load is a lot more and quite dense. For that reason I may not be able to blog daily like I used to but rather a few times a week. I will try my best to blog whenever I can and maintain some sort of schedule. Till the 11th I will be blogging daily because I missed you guys and I have a lot to say!

Changes And Opportunities

There will also be some changes to the posts since like I mentioned I won’t have as much time to write and blog for the next few months. These changes actually involve you guys! I have been so overwhelmed by how much support I have received from you guys both on my blog and privately as well that I wanted to do something positive for the community. I have seen bloggers I really enjoy reading like Zainab, Tiani and more doing interviews on their blogs and I thought that would be super fun to do on lifesfinewhine as well. I would love to interview you guys and share your blog so if you’re interested in being interviewed by me please email me at insomniacwithanaccent@gmail.com and please include your name (optional), the name of your blog (mandatory) and a link to your blog (mandatory) and I will let you know when I will get back to you as soon as possible after reviewing your blog.

Another way I wanted to help smaller blogs is by sharing posts I enjoyed every week. I thought I would share five to ten posts I really enjoyed reading or that really stood out to me every week and that way they can get a larger audience. I have seen a fellow blogger and friend Jude amongst others do something like this and I thought it was such a wonderful idea and so I decided to do something similar.

Again please email me if you would be interested in being interviewed- it’s a win-win because I get something to post about and you get your blog out there to my audience. I would love to have one interview per week but I’ll have to wait and see what sort of response I get.

Thoughts

What other stuff would you like to me to feature on this blog? Would love to hear your ideas so do let me know in the comments below!

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Guess Who’s Back-ish (Blog Update)

Guess Who’s Back-ish (Blog Update)

Thank You Again!

As promised I will tell you the whole story of everything that happened with my blog since I left. But before that I want to thank everyone for the amazing and supportive comments I have received so far- it’s taking me a while to reply and follow everyone back but I will get it done reply to everyone and follow all the blogs I used to I swear!

Self-Hosting

Honestly, everything went fine with moving to self-hosted. I ended up using WPXHosting which I personally think is the best hosting site because it has everything other sites have and one more very important thing- a 24hr chat room. The reason I picked them was actually because of this. When you go self-hosted it’s quite different from what it is like on WP- what I mean by that is you get a lot more features and stuff but you also face new problems and since you can’t talk to the Hapiness Engineers anymore you kind of have to fix everything yourself which is super difficult if like me you know very little about technology. The chat room has been super helpful for me so far although to be fair I have only had two minor issues.

The problem arose however when I connected my self-hosted site to my WP account. Just to remind you guys I left because they wrongfully blocked my WP account and I was not able to like and follow other blogs. When I contacted them they told me going self-hosted would solve the issue.

It did not. I still could not like or follow other blogs and when I talked to them about it they basically told me I would have to create and use another WP account because nothing could be done about the block. So at first I was super pissed and then I thought about it and decided if I was going to have to move to a different account anyway I may as well stay on WP and not be self-hosted because self-hosting is a lot of work and I am way to busy with university to deal with it at the moment.

Now I’m working on moving back but the issue is that since I just moved my domain from WP I have to wait for a certain number of days to move my domain back. Of course no one on WP told me about this so I had moved all my content and followers on this account and then could not move my domain- I still can’t till like the end of February. I thought maybe I’ll just stop using WP till I can move my domain but I missed you guys so much and I wanted to post again so I decided to create this backup site and post here till I can move my domain back. It’s not an ideal situation but it’s the best I can do for now.

I still love the idea of self-hosted though and maybe when I have more time I will try self-hosting again but I feel like now is just not the right time.

On A Side Note

My Twitter account got hacked a while back and I have only been able to log back in a few days ago so if you tried to contact me and I didn’t respond or responded weirdly that is why. I apologise for any inconvenience and please feel free to contact me again via Twitter as the issue has been solved.

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Guess Who’s Back-ish (An Update)

Guess Who’s Back-ish (An Update)

Thank You!

I want to start this post by thanking everyone for being so kind and patient. And thank you to everyone who reached out to me while I was away from blogging- it truly meant so much to me and kept me going! I know I didn’t always have time to respond as quickly as I would have liked to but I was just so busy with university. You guys have truly become like my Internet family and you seriously have no idea how much I missed blogging and talking to you guys everyday. So much has happened with my blog and I promise I’ll tell you EVERYTHING just not today because it’s a lot to type and I’m feeling a little lazy lol. I think I just need to get used to blogging again. Oh, and thank you to everyone who liked and commented on my post yesterday!! I woke up to so many comments and was so excited. My moderation was switched on so you may not have seen your comment on the post but don’t worry they all came through. Also since this is a new account I am no longer following the blogs I followed on my last one so if I used to follow your blog could you please comment below so I can follow you again. Please and thank you.

Okay, now let me tell you guys everything that has been going on with me and my personal life because it’s been kind of insane.

What Have I Been Up To

The first thing I wanted to tell you guys is that I’ve been thinking about starting a podcast. I feel like it would be a fun extension to the blog. I love writing but I know a lot of times I end up writing super long posts that are like 1000-2000 words and not everyone has time to read those. This way I can elaborate more about stuff I talk about on my blog anyway and if you’re interested you can listen to it and if not you can just read the post and call it a day. I am probably going to do the podcast with my sister so don’t worry it won’t just be me rambling on for like half an hour.

Some of you may remember that I accidently shaved off a part of one of my eyebrows and it never grew back. Well recently I’ve been putting a bit of hemp oil on it and it’s kind of growing back so yay! I’m not sure why I felt like I needed to share that with you but I had been making a list of everything I want to tell you guys about and it was on the list so I decided to share it since at some point I felt like it was important enough that I wanted to tell you about it.

I tried a lot of new foods and drinks while I was not blogging! It gave me time to try out new recipes and I am so excited to share them with you. I also baked cookies alone for the first time in my life because I had to for my History Of Food course and they turned out really great. I will tell you all about it really soon when I talk about my courses last semester. I also watched the movie Parasite for that course and ended up making ramen w/ steak (vegan) which turned out to be the most delicious thing EVER. I also tried oat milk for the first time and I am officially obsessed with it!

Now on to some not so positive and perky things. As you guys know I have anxiety but I also have depression. I am usually fine the majority of the time but sometimes I just get super depressed. Blogging helped a lot with my depression because it gave me an outlet for my feelings and it gave me a way to process my feelings but without blogging I was just holding a lot of stuff in. I’m glad to be blogging again and feel better already.

I’ve been having a lot of weird dreams and nightmares as well. As you guys know I’m terrified of ghosts and little children ghosts in particular seriously scare me. Well the other night- like a month ago actually- I had this dream that a little girl had died in a hospital and her doctor and I were trying to find out who killed her. Then the ghost of the little girl started haunting me and trying to show me who did it and in the end it turned out it was her doctor. It was one of the scariest dreams ever but also I couldn’t help but be impressed by the plot. Like good job brain. If that was a real movie/book I would definitely watch/read it and then immediately regret everything.

Another weird thing that happened to me that has to do with sleep is that one day I started laughing in my sleep. It was the first time this has ever happened to me and it was so freaking bizarre. I literally woke up because I was laughing so hard in my sleep!! My sister was super scared and thought I was possessed. Apparently, it’s a normal and happens sometimes when you’re stressed or something. I guess it makes sense that it happened to me since like I said I was having super weird dreams for a bit and I also tend to talk in my sleep sometimes. But it was still really strange and I hope that is the first time I ever laugh in my sleep. Have you guys ever experienced this? If you have please let me know in the comments below!

Today marks my 200th day that I have been learning German on Duolingo! That’s right I have been doing lessons for 200 days in a row and I am super proud of myself food sticking with it this time. And it’s definitely paying off because I can kind of speak and understand German now which is so exciting. Learning German has been a goal of mine since I was like 16 and I have been trying to learn it on and off but I am so happy I stuck with it this time.

Even though I have not been blogging I have been writing a lot. As you know I meditate daily and for the first few months I did not really have any major break throughs or really deep thoughts. I was kind of concentrating on just learning to focus and enjoy the moment so I was not really thinking much but lately I have been trying to become more aware of the thoughts I have while meditating. I don’t try to censor or control my brain I just let myself think and see where I end up and it has seriously helped me get my thoughts in order and just really figure out what my priorities in life are and should be. It has also really helped me deal with my emotions in a more healthy way. I mean I’m not stable all the time and I can’t say I’m amazing at meditation but I am improving and I can feel myself heading in the right direction. The other day I was meditating and thinking about how I feel the need to always be in control and plan out every aspect of my life. I was also thinking about how all that really went down the drain in 2020 and pretty much everything quickly got out of my control and I wrote down something in my meditation journal that I wanted to share with you guys. This was one of my biggest meditation break throughs:

“…We spend so much time and energy fighting the universe for control of our lives that we forget there is no battle. What is going to happen is going to happen and the harder we fight the more difficult we make our own lives. From this moment on I am going to stop fighting the Universe as it is a battle I will never win. I am going to learn to go with the Universe instead of against it. If something occurs in my life I will not let it devastate me but instead see how it can improve me.”

I don’t know if that made any sense but it really did to me and the minute I understood how little control I have it was like my anxieties melted away and I felt truly free for the first time in a long time.

What Have YOU Been Up To?

Unfortunately, since I’ve been so busy with university and stuff I have not been able to really keep in touch properly so I would love to know more about what you’ve been up to! Please let me know in the comments below what you’ve been up to, if anything new has been happening in your life, your goals for 2021 or literally just anything!

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Fitting Necessary Appointments Into Your Schedule

Edit: I’ve decided to start posting regularly again and I wanted to post about something totally random because I am kind of sick of thinking about WP lol. Thank you for your support and understanding and I hope you enjoy this post!
Most of us live pretty busy lives. Most of us work jobs that we have to commute to, or we are working from home and having to adapt to the new working circumstances or if you’re a student like me you are doing online classes or in-school classes. Many of us have children to take care of or pets who we have to walk and groom. That’s before we even consider personal activities, personal relaxation time or anything else.
So, it really isn’t all too surprising that many of us begin to neglect our own health and wellbeing. We’re so busy sticking to commitments and helping others that we will often let our own needs pass under the radar. But a good way to combat this, at least a little, is to make sure that you keep up to date with your recommended health appointments.
Now, there are a number of different health appointments that you should be attending and they may be determined by your sex, age and other factors. But for now, let’s focus on just a few that you should make sure to schedule into your calendar.

Dental Appointments

You shouldn’t only go to the dentist if you are experiencing problems with your teeth or gums. You should check in once every six months for a general checkup too! A checkup will help your dentist to identify any problems with your teeth and gums before they start causing you pain or other issues. This is ideal, as prevention is always better than cure.
When you attend your dental appointment, your dentist will take a good look around your mouth, can identify any issues and can recommend future treatment if any issues are identified. This is a time where they could potentially see warning signs of small cavities or gum disease. If you have underlying issues, such as wisdom teeth coming through, they could also carry out an X-ray to see problems that lie under the surface. You may also want to ask for a scale and polish, which will help you to leave the dentist’s office with a shining smile, free of tartar and plaque.
I am not sure if you are aware of this but I have talked about it in my other posts- I have weird teeth. I have very sensitive teeth and I have more teeth under my adult teeth so going to the dentist is definitely very important for me and it actually helps a lot to keep my weird teeth in check.

Eye Tests

Now, let’s move onto another common, but less regular, health appointment – eye tests. It’s generally recommended that you get an eye test with a professional optician once every two years. The appointment really doesn’t take all too long – roughly half an hour in total. Half an hour every two years really isn’t all too much of an ask, but can make all the difference to your health!
So, what can you expect during an eye appointment? Well, first you will find that your optician will take a look at the health of your eye from front to back. They may take some pictures. This will help them to determine if your eyes are health are not. If they diagnose any conditions, you can then be referred on to receive treatment for them. These conditions can be eye related, such as glaucoma or cataracts, or they could entail your wider health, such as diabetes. Without an eye test, these conditions could be left undiagnosed and could potentially worsen over time. Another part of the eye test will check your colour vision and alertness. 
Finally, you’ll encounter the most famous part of any eye test – the part where you read letters from a board at a distance. This will help your optometrist to determine if your sight has deteriorated at all. If it has, they can prescribe you lenses that can rectify your vision and help you to see more clearly. This prescription can then help you to choose some glasses or contact lenses to help you with your vision in day to day life. You can find more info here.

Cervical Screening

If you are a woman over the age of 25, you should make the time to attend a cervical screening appointment as and when is appropriate for your age group. This appointment is common and consequently has a variety of names that people will refer to it with. You may hear people referring to cervical screening as a “smear test” or a “pap smear”. These are all exactly the same procedure and the appointments will all be exactly the same. Cervical screening is a process that will take swabs from your cervix (the entrance or “barrier” between your womb and your vagina) so that medical professionals can take a look at cellular material there and identify any existing irregularities.
If the professionals do find any irregularities, they are likely to carry out further testing as a precautionary check for cancerous cells or cancer. Between the ages of 25 and 44, you will have a cervical screening carried out once every three years. Between 45 and 60, you will be asked to have a cervical screening carried out once every five years. 

Conclusion

Scheduling these appointments into your calendar really isn’t too difficult a task to carry out. None of them will take up all too much of your time, but each can make a whole lot of difference to your overall health and wellbeing. Sure, you may need to take others into account. But you should make sure you’re looking after yourself too!
So, take some time right now to determine when you are free and when you can fit these appointments in. Then reach out to the relevant places and book in. Make sure to avoid putting these appointments off. Once they’re done, they’re out of the way and you don’t have to think about them again for a little while!


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An Update- Kind Of

If you haven’t read yesterdays post I would recommend you do so before reading this one. You can read it by clicking here.
So, I want to start out by saying THANK YOU! You guys are absolutely amazing and I truly appreciate everyone’s support on my last post. I am always so touched by how caring and supportive this community is and that’s why it’s so difficult for me to consider leaving it. You guys have become like family to me and I truly appreciate every comment you guys leave.

WP’s Response

I decided to share the emails with you guys so that you can see for yourselves just how irritating this situation is. When I initially told them about my issue this is the email I received yesterday telling me I had been blocked.

I felt like they were incredibly passive-aggressive about the situation and just started blaming me off the bat without even finding out all the details of the situation. They didn’t even do their research well because they clearly got the number of blogs I follow wrong- by literally thousands…
I tried to politely let them know that they had made a mistake and even sent them a screenshot as proof showing the actual number of blogs I follow which can be found in your wp-admin dashboard.

They completely ignored the fact that they made a mistake, did not even address the issues and pretty much told me to leave WordPress.com and move to a self-hosted site. Except, from my research I have learnt that if they wanted to they could unblock me- they have done so for other people. They just don’t want to. At least they offered to refund me my money for the plan.

My guess is that their site has serious glitches- all my comments were showing up as read on my notifications for a while which I’m guessing is them reading the comments. My Ads revenue went away for a few days and then came back. My traffic page has been glitching for a while now. And it’s not just me- multiple people have been effected.
I read a post online by a woman who didn’t use WP for MONTHS and came back to find she had been blocked from following accounts. How is that even possible when she did not use her account for months. Clearly, their algorithm does not know the difference between spam/bots and actual interaction/blogs. And instead of fixing this they blame the victims for being too interactive which is so weird because blogging is supposed to be an interactive hobby. The interaction is the best part for me.
Also how am I being accused of self-promoting on other blogs when I have literally never commented trying to promote my own blog. I always try to leave comments about the post and only ever leave a link if I feel like the post would help the reader/I have nominated them for something. And that is as RARE as Selena Gomez’s makeup line (can you tell I’ve been binge watching makeup videos online?).
I mean how do you accuse someone of stuff like that without even reading the comments they have left or the posts they have written. Especially when all these comments are sitting in my spam folder- how come they aren’t being blocked?



And let’s be honest- a permanent block is so excessively mean- I mean most social platforms have blocks but it’s usually for an hour/day/month. Permanent blocks with no prior warning is just so awful for people like me who are blocked due to errors on their part.

What Now?

I am considering moving to a self-hosted site but it will be a lot of work so I’m going to wait till I have my mid term break. Till then I guess I will keep blogging as I usually do and not like/follow anything. I will continue to leave comments on your blogs and support you guys as much as I can.
I will write in more detail about moving to a self-hosted site once I do more research because I know some of you may be interested in moving to self-hosted as well.

Some Disturbing Things You Should Know About WordPress.com

  1. They Own All Your Content


Source: https://www.crazyegg.com/
No, not some of your content. Not most of your content. They own ALL your content and can apparently do exactly what they want with it whether you like it or not. I found this very concerning because as creators don’t we have any rights to our own content that WE created.
2. They Can Terminate Your Site

Source: https://www.crazyegg.com/
They can terminate your site whenever they want without even giving you an explanation. If that’s not super scary I don’t know what is. Can you imagine all your hard work being deleted and never seeing it again? Even if you decide not to move to a self-hosted site I would recommend backing up all your posts so that if your site does get deleted by mistake at least you will still have your posts.
I hope this information helps because I did not know about this before and it’s actually very scary to think that they have this much power over you. I also want to warn other bloggers- be careful with liking/following/commenting. I think recently there has been a lot of spam/bots on WP and they are handling it horribly and I would hate to see what happened to me happen to anyone else. Also please back up all your posts and media- I would hate to see someone lose everything over a mistake on WP’s part.
Also if my blog disappears they’ve probably terminated me for writing this post…

HELP!

For those of you who already have self-hosted sites could you please tell me more about it in the comments. What host are you using? Would you recommend it? What problems have you run into if any? Did moving to self-hosted effect your traffic and follow in anyway? How would you recommend making the move? Are you up for hire to move my site for me? Thanks I really appreciate any information I can get although I got quite a bit of information on the last post which I truly appreciate!

Random Announcement

This may be the weirdest time and most random post to announce this on but after years of hating on social media I have finally started a Facebook page lol! I won’t be super active on it but I will reply to messages and post updates about my blog so if you are interested feel free to head over and follow the page and friend my profile (that’s how FB works right? I’m not too sure to be honest…) Either way thank you in advance for stopping by and supporting it!
Page: https://www.facebook.com/Lifesfinewhine
Profile: https://www.facebook.com/pooja.gudka.79


To sum everything up- yes lifesfinewhine will go back to normal posts starting tomorrow and eventually I will move to a self-hosted site. Again thank you for the continued support- you guys are the absolute best!


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I’m Done With WordPress

If you read yesterdays post you probably know that I was having trouble with my WordPress site. I was not surprised because that happens quite often because WordPress does have quite a few bugs it needs to work on. The problem was that I was not able to like or follow other blogs/posts.
I contacted the Happiness Engineers and although they were very nice they were not able to fix the problem and I was told the team was working on it. I was busy yesterday so I just hoped for the best and moved on. Today I did a bit more research and from other peoples experience it says that apparently WP blocks you from from liking and following if you like or follow too many.
Here’s the problem with that- I have about 18.6k followers- obviously I am going to be following quite a few blogs and I get about a hundred comments a day. When someone comments on my blog I generally head over to their blog and also leave a like and comment because I really think WP is a two-way street and the best way to get people to engage with your posts is to engage on theirs. If you have ever liked or commented on one of my posts you probably noticed that I liked/commented on your as well.
Since I get about a hundred comments a day and let’s say like half of them are replies I still end up visiting like 50 blogs a day and leaving likes/comments. Because of my university starting again for the fall semester I have been forced to stick to a pretty tight schedule. I schedule out about an hour every day to like/comment on other blogs that have liked/commented on mine. I also spend like 15 minutes a day going through new followers and follow back blogs I like- usually like 5 a day.  I get about 50 followers a day so I don’t think 5 a day is that bad.
Anyway, since WP’s system sucks- they literally let actual bots and spammers through- I think I have been blocked because you can’t like more than like 15 blog posts an hour and you can’t follow more than a certain amount of blogs overall. Some people online said you can’t undo this block. If that’s the case I’m not sure if I can keep blogging anymore. My favourite part of blogging has always been interacting with other blogs and now I’m scared to even comment on other blogs in case it blocks me from commenting.
I hate how unhelpful the WP system is. It’s so frustrating. They never listen to their followers- like with what happened with the new editor- and they are EXTREMELY unhelpful when you actually need their help. They’re super nice and polite but just don’t seem to be equipped to handle literally almost any situation. They give you almost no information about what’s going on. I’m just super pissed. I feel like years of hard work just went down the drain. I’m done. I’m VERY done with WP. I am going to try and leave comments on all your blogs though even if I can’t like them. Until I get blocked that is- probably going to happen soon I’m guessing. Anyway, sorry I can’t like your blogs but just know that I will still support other blogs somehow- probably by commenting on them considering that’s literally all I can do right now.
If you don’t see any posts from me for a while or in case this is the last time we communicate I just want to wish everyone the best with their blogging and everything in their life. I hope this awful year ends and things start getting better really soon.
Edit: They have blocked me- I got an email. They seem to have mistaken how many followers I have with how many blogs I follow. When I sent them proof of this with screenshots they stopped responding- this was a few hours ago. I am beyond done with this situation. 

Ask Me Something #2

What Is This?

In March, I did my first “ASK ME SOMETHING” post and it was so much fun. A lot of my readers told me they had enjoyed it and wanted me to do another one and I honestly had such a great time answering your very interesting questions so I wanted to do another one as well. I had been meaning to do another one again for so long but stuff kept coming up and I could not find the right time to schedule another post like that. However, I decided to do one today since I have a bit more free time next week.

So, How Does This Work?

In case you hadn’t participated in the last Ask Me Something post or have forgotten how it works I thought I would leave the instructions here again. So, I got the idea for this from how people have that “ask me anything” box on Instagram and thought it would be a lot of fun to do on WordPress too because I have a larger following here and people are a lot more interested in connecting with one another rather than just playing the following/unfollowing. And on that note follow me on Instagram by clicking here- I promise I won’t follow/unfollow you! 😂
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I thought it would be particularly fun as some of us are stuck at home and don’t have a lot going on (I’m some of us…). I thought this would be a fun way to connect, start some fun conversations, get to know one another better and just have a nice little virtual get together in the comments section!
Okay so back to how it works. All you have to do is leave a question/questions in the comments section.

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After about a week I will publish a post tagging you along with your question and will give an answer to the question on the post.

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In case that was confusing to understand because I am the worst at explaining stuff please go see my last Ask Me Something post and Your Questions Answered post to get a better idea of exactly how it will work.

Thank you!

I want to thank everyone in advance for your comment and for being a part of this! Honestly, it’s just so great that we have this awesome platform on which we can connect with each other. I think I may have gone crazy stuck at home if it hadn’t been for this blog. So again, thank you in advance!!


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Cancel Culture- My Thoughts

What Is Cancel Culture?

Cancel culture refers to the popular practice of withdrawing support for (canceling) public figures and companies after they have done or said something considered objectionable or offensive. Cancel culture is generally discussed as being performed on social media in the form of group shaming.
– Source: https://www.dictionary.com/e/pop-culture/cancel-culture/

My Thoughts

Before I give my opinion on cancel culture I just wanted to have a little introduction. The reason I decided to discuss this topic today was because cancel culture is something you can’t get away from right now especially if you use social media. I had been meaning to write this post for a while now but to be honest I had been hoping it goes away and I wouldn’t have to write about it. Unfortunately, it seems that it’s still very much here. I also haven’t done a post where I share my opinions about something for a while and you guys seem to like those kind of posts so I decided to write this post today.
So, I am pretty much going to try and dissect cancel culture and sort of try and break it down into smaller parts and discuss those instead of just talking about it as a whole. I will discuss it as a whole towards the end of the post though because I think that’s also necessary.

1.Call-outs

The first part of cancel culture is generally calling out a person, people or a company for something they may have done in the past or are still doing. This is the part I agree with because a lot of people/companies have done questionable things and are still continuing to do so. I think when you see an injustice being committed it is your job to call it out and try to bring awareness to it.
What I disagree with is how people are being called out. Yes, some people and companies are being called out as there is solid proof about what they have done, however, due to the way social media works a lot of times you see people being called out for doing/saying something when in reality there may not be any truth to it or what they have said/done may be taken out of context completely. I think if you are going to accuse someone of something the least you can do is find actual evidence of what they have done.
Another problem with these call-outs is that it gives trolls the power to exploit cancel-culture. There are times when someone will go out of their way to fabricate stuff about someone to make it seem like they did/said something horrible when they actually haven’t. And because everyone tends to blindly jump on the bandwagon they end up getting “cancelled” when they actually haven’t even done anything.

2. The Cancellation

Now once someone gets called out people usually use like a hashtag or something to get more peoples attention and eventually the person gets “cancelled.” This is the part I have a pretty big problem with.
I may sound like a bit too much of an optimist when I say this but truth be told I believe that the majority of people out there are good. They may not be fully good but I think most people have at least some good in them. I know that I am definitely not the best person ever and I know that most people have their negatives and their positives. No one is perfect- we have all done bad things and we have all done good things.
I don’t think “cancelling” people is the solution. To be frank I don’t think it’s even solution. I think it does help bring awareness to certain things such as unethical company practices, racist things people/companies have done, misogynistic things people/companies have done but at the same time it only highlights these things instead of coming up with an actual solution to address them.

3. The Results

This is probably the biggest problem I have with cancel culture. They keep calling people out- often quite randomly without any real research- and when the hashtag stops trending people completely forget about what happened. Usually the person/company puts out a- very obviously made by their PR- apology, people criticize the apology, the person/company lays low for a few days and everything goes back to normal.
If you are going to call someone out for their behaviour or actions its also your job to come up with a way to make sure that this behaviour/action does not happen again and that the person or company that is being called out both takes responsibilities and action to rectify their behaviour.
If someone is called out and then completely ignored what’s the point of calling them out. The whole point should be to bring change and to do that you need to keep checking up on that person/company and make sure that they are behaving in a more ethical way. You can’t forget stuff as soon as it stops trending or people stop talking about it.

My Overall Thoughts On Cancel Culture

I don’t want to totally come after gen Z or millennials- being one myself I do understand where their frustration comes from. We are lucky enough to be able to get higher education. access to so much information both online and offline, access to news from around the world and so much more. It’s a privilege but it can also be extremely overwhelming.
When you see everything that’s wrong with the world these days, when you see all the injustices that exist it really makes your blood boil and it does make you want to do something about it and one way we know how to do this is through the internet. And there are some phenomenal people online making a difference by fighting for equality and more.
Unfortunately, there is also a downside to fighting for things online or online activism. A lot of people these days don’t have great attention spans and shock value sells. People need to shock people to really get their attention and I feel like cancel culture is a part of this. It builds outrage for a little while and then people lose their concentration and move on to something different.
Before you blame this on phones, social media, younger generations etc. I would like to point out that this isn’t the only time people have started a movement and then lost their focus. As a history major I know that this happens all the time. Just one example is the 60’s counterculture. What started off as an amazing cause to bring change over the next few years became increasingly fractioned and eventually a lot of it became concentrated on drug use and other things. Many lost sight of what they were fighting for in the beginning. This isn’t the exact same obviously but I’m just trying to bring out a comparison.
One of the main problems I see with cancel culture is that it does a lot more harm than good. Yes, it calls out people but at the same time since there is little actual evidence it sometimes destroys the life of innocent people. Furthermore, it also gives the majority too much power and this power can- and is- being used for evil. A lot of times people call out other people for revenge or because they hate them rather than because they want to make the world a better place.
Even the people who are rightfully called out often don’t face any real life consequences. I admit that some do and that’s fine but a lot of times like I mentioned earlier they make a half-assed apology and then move on with their lives doing exactly what they want to do.
It also encourages uniformity which I hate. It encourages people to follow others or go with the trends but the trends/other people are not always right. You need to do your own research, make your own decisions and do what you think is the right thing to do not what everyone on social media tells you to do.
It also tends to take attention away from real problems that are occurring in the real world. Remember Karmageddon that happened on YouTube? It called out a bunch of people but did it really make that much of a difference? Jeffree Star is still out there living his best life, Tati is still making money off her pills, Shane is laying low but I just know he’ll be back soon and no one will care. A lot of times the things that are called out are real life problems and therefore there need to be real life solutions not an online cancellation.
I also want to mention that cancel culture very often tends to see everything in black and white. People are either good or evil. There is no grey area. However, this is very far from the truth. In reality almost everything in the world is grey. There is always good AND bad with every situation and looking at something/someone in just one light is very damaging.
For example, let’s talk about big companies paying their workers abroad really badly. When you look at it at first you obviously think that’s so unethical and awful- and you would be right if you’re thinking this. It’s awful- people are treated inhumanely and paid barely anything for their hard work.
However, when I studied it in one of my sociology classes I was able to think about it a bit more. A lot of people boycott these companies and therefore the company produces less products which means that the workers who were barely making anything to begin with get completely laid off or in some cases get paid even less than before. In the end these companies are going to do whatever they have to to make a profit- often times these measures are very unethical. As for the workers- they come from very poor backgrounds, many are women and children who absolutely need that- awful and super unethical- wage to survive. When you boycott the company and these people get laid off they lose this income which as small as it seems was very vital to their survival.
I’m not trying to criticise anyone with this example- if you choose to but ethically sourced and made products that is truly amazing and I really respect that. I’m just trying to show that things aren’t always in black and white- in fact they rarely are. Things are a lot more complicated than they seem. What we sometimes hear about and react to without doing our research is often just the tip of the iceberg.
In conclusion, I’ll say that I do understand where the cancel culture stems from and I do understand wanting to be part of the change but truth be told cancelling someone is just not it. We need to find a more realistic way to address things. I am also someone who believes that change is possible and that if we believe in something we should use our words to explain why we believe in that instead of blindly cancelling people. Explain to them why you believe they are wrong in a rational way.
I hope you found this post interesting. I tried to stay unbias and look at both the positives and negatives on cancel culture instead of just fixating on either the negatives or positives.
What are your thoughts on cancel culture? Do you think it’s a good thing? Do you think it’s a bad thing? As always let me know what you think in the comments below. Also let me know if you enjoy these kinds of posts where I try to talk about something in depth. It’s really fun for me because this is kind of what I do with my research papers anyway so it’s great practice but I’m not sure if you guys enjoy these kind of posts. So please let me know- your feedback is super helpful!


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How To Feel At Peace With The Way You Look

Perfections And Imperfections

woman holding red flower
(Unsplash CC0)
Self-esteem and body image sometimes go together.
When we’re not happy with the way we look, we can lose confidence, and hide away from others. On the flip side, when we do feel happy about our appearance, we can act confidently and feel better within ourselves. This is something you might identify with.
Of course, your appearance shouldn’t define the way you feel about yourself. None of us are perfect, so you shouldn’t let any so-called imperfections get you down.
I know it can be a struggle to accept your imperfections and to love your body the way it is- it has definitely been a struggle for me. It does help a lot that there is so much more love for plus sized bodies but I still feel like we’re not quite there when it comes to loving all body types.
If you- like most of us- are struggling with what you look like at the moment, if you do need a boost in your self-confidence, and if you do want to feel at peace about the way you look, consider the following suggestions. 

#1: Don’t accept the media’s definition of beauty

Many of our insecurities come from the media’s definition of beauty. When we scroll through fashion magazines or browse websites that feature our favorite celebs and reality TV stars, we can start to feel less-than. We start to compare ourselves unfavorably to the way they look, with their super-slim bodies, expensive fashion tastes, and bright, white smiles. We focus on our flaws and lose confidence because we feel that we aren’t as attractive as they are.
But here’s the thing. If you ever feel like this, skip overthinking. Yes, the people you see on the page or screen might be attractive but doesn’t mean they are more beautiful than you. And besides, many images are photoshopped to eliminate signs of any flaws, so what you see might not be reality anyway. The celebs you adore also have make-up artists and fashion designers working for them, so of course they look good. The way they look without any enhancements might tell the real truth.
Instead of comparing yourself, create your own definition of beauty. Consider the aspects of your face and body that you enjoy, and embrace what is good about you. And look at the people you meet every day and consider those aspects that make them radiate beauty. It could be the way they smile at you or the way they rock an outfit that others might consider unfashionable. Beauty is multi-faceted, so don’t get hung up on the way the media portrays it. 

#2: Make changes where you need to

If making a change will make you feel at peace with yourself, then fine. If you think a brand new outfit from the store will give you the confidence you crave, buy it! If fixing your smile with cosmetic dentistry will improve the way you feel, then by all means, book that appointment with a dentist. And if your hairstyle doesn’t fit the way you want to think about yourself, go and see a stylist.
By doing something rather than nothing about your looks, you can make improvements where you feel they are needed. Again, you shouldn’t define yourself on the way you look, but if you know you will feel better about yourself after making a change here and there, then do what needs to be done.
I know that a lot of people will say love yourself as you are and I agree that you definitely should do that. However, in my opinion if something about your self really bothers you to an extent where you need to change it and can afford to do so I think you should go for it. Sometimes little changes like changing your makeup, hairstyle etc. can be a huge confidence booster. I know that I got a lot more confident after I learnt how to do makeup and wear my hair properly.

#3: Wear what you want to wear

woman spreading arms near body of water
(Unsplash CC0)
You don’t have to buy the outfits that are on-trend, as they might not suit your body or your tastes. And you don’t have to dress to impress your friends, as they should love you, no matter what you choose to wear. 
In all of your buying choices, buy those outfits that you know you will look good in. And focus on those pieces that are fitted to your body size. When you look good and feel good, you will feel more at peace with yourself, regardless of the opinion of others. 
A lot of times, companies try to sell the same style to everyone but everyone is unique. On the one hand what looks great on someone may not be for you and on the other hand what looks great on you may not look good on someone else. We all have our own unique style and we need to embrace them instead of embracing uniformity.
So, with all of your choices, learn to dress your truth. Embrace the styles and colors that are pleasing to you and choose those that match your personality. When you wear what you want to wear, you will discover a more confident you. 
And don’t feel pressured not to wear something because you feel like people will judge you for it. If someone is shallow enough to judge you by how you look or what you wear you really don’t want someone like that in your life anyway.

#4: Focus your attention on your best bits

For the bits of yourself that you’re not happy with, do what you can to change them if you want to. But instead of dwelling on them, focus on your best bits instead. Show gratitude for them, be positive, and remind yourself of your best features whenever you’re feeling down about your looks.
Then do what you can to draw attention to your favorite features. If you love your lips, learn how to apply lipstick properly, and choose those colors that will make your lips stand out. if you love your eyes, choose the eyeshadows that will complement your eye color. And if you love your cheeks, play around with a highlighter and a good contour to emphasize them even more.
It’s not easy to love every inch of your body but you can start by loving the small things about yourself that you do like and then move on to the parts of you that may not be your favourite. 
So, today, be happy with who you are, and stop comparing yourself to others. Dress the way you want to if it will make you feel good. You are beautiful, so remember that, and be kinder to yourself today.

Thoughts

What are some of the ways through which you love yourself and your body? How do you feel at peace with the way you look? As always let me know in the comments below because I would love to hear from you.


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5 Random Things About Me

About Me

Today, I thought I would share some random things about myself. I thought this would be a fun post and since I haven’t done something like this in a long time I thought that it would be a fun way for you guys to get to know me a little better and for me to also get to know you guys a little better.
In order for me to get to know you guys a bit better I am hoping that you guys will leave some random facts about you as well- if you feel comfortable enough to share them there is not pressure to do so of course!
Anyway, here are five random things about me that you may or may not know. I have mentioned some of them before so a lot of you guys may already know a couple of these but I tried to also add some really random ones too that I don’t think I have talked about before on the blog.
To check out my official about me page you can click here.

I have a really bad temper


This one comes as a surprise to many people who don’t know me personally or in real life. But yes, I do have a pretty bad temper. If I see red and you happen to be the reason why you may want to stay away from me for a day or two… I have always had trouble with my temper and it got worse as a teenager. I think it stemmed from my inability to properly express myself due to my anxiety. I have always been someone who represses my feelings but what that often leads to is all your negative emotions boiling up until you snap- which is what I would do.
However, over the last few years with the help of alternative medications such as CBD oil I have been able to get a much better control over my emotions and I have also learnt to express myself in a more positive and healthy manner. Of course, I still get angry sometimes and snap at people but it’s way less often now and much less hurtful.

I used to have a blog before this one


Yup, it’s true you guys- I had a blog before lifesfinewhine but it wasn’t on WordPress. It’s honestly kind of hazy because I had no idea what I was doing but I started a blog on Bloglovin’ (I think I’m really not sure) and the energy just did not feel right to me for some reason and it just felt too complicated and forced. That’s why I ended up creating another blog on WordPress which was the best decision ever.
In retrospect I get that the other blog feeling off was probably just the universes way of pushing me in the right direction- towards WordPress of course. I’m very glad I ended up here because the WordPress community for the most part has been so kind, accepting and supportive and I’m very thankful for that.
For those of you guys who were on other platform or are currently on other blogging platforms as well apart from WordPress I’m curious. Do you prefer WordPress or the other platform and why?

I’m a pretty sensitive person


I’ve always been a sensitive person. I get my feelings hurt pretty easily and I do tend to be more emotional about stuff. The thing is I always saw this as a weakness and tried really hard to suppress my feelings because I did not want people to see me crying or acting emotional. That was obviously a really stupid idea because there’s nothing wrong with being emotional. If anything it’s a really good idea to express yourself and just let it out.
Over the last few years I have been trying really hard to be more expressive and to let people in because I do tend to be cold and shut people out. It’s definitely something I still need to work on but I think at the same time I am doing better than I was before because I have been open to more experiences and I have been working on expressing myself better.
Now if I feel something, negative or positive, I just let myself feel it. Yes, the negative stuff hurts a lot sometimes but I would rather process my feelings in a healthy way than have to repress them and have them all come out at random times.

I’m terrified of the dark/ghosts


I have always been scared of the dark and of anything paranormal. I’m not sure when all of this began because like even in my earliest memories I can remember being scared of the dark and having to sleep with some sort of light switched on.
I also don’t know why I’m so scared of the dark or paranormal stuff- watching The Sixth Sense when I was super young did not help the situation. Or any of the other horror movies I watched even though I knew they would come back to haunt me (no pun intended…). Now that I think of it I have seen so much stuff about ghosts, paranormal activity and bad things happening in the dark for someone who is terrified of all that stuff- why do we humans like to torture ourselves??
Anyway, back to the point- paranormal stuff scares the crap out of me and now I tend to just make sure I don’t watch anything with paranormal stuff in it. I also like having a nightlight switched on because I still can’t sleep in the dark.

I have Trypophobia


Trypophobia is an aversion to the sight of irregular patterns or clusters of small holes or bumps. It is not officially recognized as a mental disorder, but may be diagnosed as a specific phobia if excessive fear and distress occur. Source: Wikipedia.
I’m not scared of holes but they do disgust me. They disgust me a lot. When I look at holes I feel super uncomfortable, sometimes nauseous and sometimes it kind of makes me want to scratch my skin off. I don’t know why I feel this way but apparently it’s pretty common. A close friend of mine has it too and it’s just nice to know I’m not alone. I just thought I was weird but I guess there are lots of us weirdos out there lol!

Thoughts

I hope you enjoyed these facts about me and I hope you learnt something new about me!
Did you already know this about me or were you surprised by of the things I mentioned? What fact about me were you surprised most by? Could you relate to any of the things I mentioned above? Let me know in the comments below because I love talking to you guys and feel free to leave random things about yourself below in the comments as well!


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